Falling asleep with Lacey in my arms is comforting and terrifying at the same time.
Waking up to her standing in front of the window, taking in the blue sky, is fucking heaven.
Then she turns to me with a sad smile, one that reminds me we're about to go straight to hell.
We spend the day with my mom as she goes through another round of tests. Okay, we spend most of the day with my dad in Mom's empty hospital room, waiting for doctors to bring her back.
It's easier getting through this with Lacey's hand pressed against mine.
We don't leave until the hospital is ready to kick us out. And we don't go home. We get pho with Piper and Kit then go to their place to watch Gossip Girl on the couch for hours.
It's like that for days. Lacey sleeps over. She goes to the hospital with me. She reads us well enough to work on her laptop when it's just me and Mom and Dad and Ethan and Piper.
Then we spend the night together.
It's Thursday. Or maybe it's Friday. I'm losing track of days. There's no reason for me to know the date during off-times, not when we're done with nearly everything we need to do for the album.
Mom is sitting up in bed. We're all playing five hundred rummy on her tray table. And we're laughing over Piper putting down the last ace Ethan was waiting for.
Lacey rests her head on my shoulder. She looks up at me with a smile. It's not so much this is great, I'm so fucking happy. It's more I'm glad I get to be here for you.
She squeezes my hand and leans in to press her lips against mine.
Piper squeals and snaps a photo with her cell.
Kit chuckles and wraps his arms around her.
Ethan shakes his head. "Really?"
She nods. "Of course." She shows off the photo to everyone, even Mom and Dad. "Would you ever expected Mal to have been this cute?"
Ethan shrugs. True.
Then Mom's doctor steps into the room and we all fall silent.
Dr. Wilson adjusts her glasses. She adjusts her lab coat as she motions to the chairs around the bed. "I need to speak with you alone, Doctor Strong."
Mom looks to Dad. "My husband should be here."
The doctor presses her lips together.
Mom ignores the doctor's trepidation. "You too, Mal."
r /> I nod. "Of course." I always figured Mom bailed because she could legally trust me with Ethan and Piper, but maybe it was because she actually did trust me to take care of my little brother and sister.
Lacey squeezes me and whispers, "I'll be outside."
She leaves with everyone else.
I move the chairs back into position.
Doctor Wilson looks to the closed door then she moves in towards the bed. She looks to me then to Dad. Her expression gets serious.
Well, more serious. She's already a serious woman.
"We've pinpointed your condition, Shirley," she says.
Mom stares back at her. "That should be good."