They’d careened way the hell over the line—and that was on him. But there were other lines he could keep them from crossing. That he could keep himself from crossing.
Uncertainty flickered through Shayna’s wide eyes, and he hated himself for it. He really did. But she brazened it out like the brave woman he was discovering her to be. “Can’t blame a girl for being eager.”
He chuffed out a laugh despite himself. “Is that so?”
She grinned as her hand unzipped his jeans and slipped into his open fly. Then under his boxers. Until she held his cock in the warmth of her grip.
“Fuck,” he groaned, watching a new line get blurrier and blurrier until he could barely see it at all.
Don’t was on the tip of his tongue again. Say it, Parrish. Fucking do the right thing and say it.
But all he did was close his eyes at the goodness of her touch. At the way she stroked him. Root to tip, root to tip. At the way her palm circled around his sensitive head. At the way her thumb found and spread the pre-come at his tip.
At the way she kissed down his chest, his pecs, his abs, her chin and her hair nuzzling his cock.
He fucking loved it. Of course, he did.
Billy ate up Shayna’s desire for him like it was the air he needed to breathe. But that just proved he was a greedy, selfish, self-centered sonofabitch. There was so much she didn’t know about him. So much he would never tell her either.
About how he thought others had deserved to live more than him. About how he sometimes wished he’d died in their places. About how he used sex and fighting to escape the pain of his guilt and his loneliness and his insecurity and his massive nerve damage from the burns.
And about how, once, he’d used his pain meds to escape that pain—too many of them. Enough that it’d left his mother to find him unconscious and apparently barely breathing.
In his heart of hearts, Billy still wasn’t sure whether or not he’d done it on purpose. Or whether his intent had been more than a temporary escape. Either way, he’d nearly thrown away—carelessly—what some of his brothers had lost forever.
With that thought, the line he’d been struggling not to cross got a helluva lot clearer again.
He opened his mouth to put an end to this, except that was the exact moment that Shayna’s mouth closed around his cock. Wet and hot and deep.
Billy nearly shouted at how good it felt. And in the wake of coming up against the mental edge of his greatest failings and his most shameful weaknesses, feeling anything good was a goddamned miracle.
He couldn’t end it. He couldn’t pull away. He couldn’t avoid letting them cross the line. Again.
Instead, his hands went to the back of Shayna’s head, resting there, at first, as her mouth moved over him again and again. Then urging her on with the slightest pressure. Her hair was so soft against his fingers and her mouth was so intense around his dick and her humming moans were so sweet in his ear.
“God, Shay, your fucking mouth,” he gritted out as his hand fisted in her curls.
She pulled off long enough to gasp a breath. “Show me what you like, Billy,” she rasped before taking him in deep again.
Her words shot sensation into his balls, and all he could do was obey. He drew his hips back and then rocked forward again, fucking her mouth in a long, slow in and out.
“Aw, yeah,” he said, the words repeating with each torturous stroke. “Aw, yeah, Shay.”
Gripping his hip in her hand, she moaned and opened her mouth wider, her tongue sticking out to just bathe his balls.
“Yes, take it deep,” he rasped. “Roll onto your back.” When she did, he kicked off his jeans and boxers and then braced himself atop her, knees next to her shoulders, his cock finding its way between her lips again. Except t
his time he had an absolutely mind-blowing view as he peered down and watched his length disappear inside her mouth. “Yes, take it.”
Those sea-blue eyes flickered backward, towards him, and their gazes collided.
All at once, his orgasm was a freight train barreling down his spine and nailing him in the ass. His balls went tight and his hips jerked and he had just enough time to pull free of her heat as he yelled, “Christ, I’m coming.”
His release shot through him in tormenting pulses that lashed at Shay’s cheek, her throat, her lips. Which was when Billy realized that she held her mouth wide for it, her hand directing his head inside again. So she could drink him down.
Peering up at him once more, she licked at where he’d spilled on her cheek and, not quite able to reach it all, she swiped at it with a fingertip and drew his cum to her mouth. Her lips ovaled around the wet finger.
He wasn’t sure if it was the eye contact when he felt so fucking raw. Or if it was the decadence of her willingness to not only swallow his cum but drink even what he’d spilled. Or if it was the way she hummed in pleasure as she did it.