Sick Heart: A Dark MMA Fighter Romance

But then one of them—the leader, I think—locks eyes with me. He looks away real quick.

Forget the fact that my “father” is Udulf van Hauten, the man who controls this ship. I might not have an arsenal strapped to my body the way this merc does, but I’m not a guy you fuck with on a whim. It would be a very stupid move to steal that bottle of Lectra from my boy, and that merc gets it.

I go down the stairs and my team follows. This ship is only four years old, but there are others. Older ones, smaller ones that I spent far more time on. Hell, I practically grew up on the Deep Sea Galaxy. But I know my way around the Bull of Light. My last four fights have been hosted here.

My team and I have dedicated quarters on the deck below the command center. I push through a door, take us out onto a catwalk, and then enter the port side structure where my family compartments are.

This is Evard’s first time here, so when I step into the main room and wave everyone forward, it’s his face I concentrate on.

I really like to make the stupid kid happy for some reason. Maybe because I remember all too well what it was like for me when I was his age.

He doesn’t disappoint. His smile is broad and real as he crosses the room and stands in front of the window, looking out at the work happening down below us.

We have a perfect view of the massive crane on the port side. It’s not busy right now, but it’s still something impressive. There are dozens of men down on the deck. It’s actually quite a nice place to people-watch, if you’re into that sort of thing.

“Wow.” Evard is properly impressed.

Rainer walks over and takes the bottle from him, holds it up. “What the fuck are you gonna do with this?”

I grab it, walk into the head, pop the cork, and start pouring out a hundred thousand dollars’ worth of Lectra.

“Jesus Christ.” Maart is behind me, crowding me, grabbing the bottle before I can waste any more. “You don’t pour it out, dickface. We’re gonna drink this later after you win!”

I laugh a little. And that reminds me of the girl. She laughed a little too and I liked the sound of that laugh.

Who is she?

Lazar’s daughter—for lack of a better word—obviously.

But her presence here is a little bit disturbing.

I suddenly crave some alone time so I can think about her a little more. There are two sleeping compartments on either side of the main room with bunk beds. I share with Maart and Evard and Rainer will take the other one. So that’s where I head next.

Maart doesn’t follow. He knows my fight-day routine. Actually, it’s not just a fight-day routine. It’s more like an every-day routine.

At least when I can get it.

There are interviews scheduled in a few hours. I will have to attend so they can get photos of me before the fight, but Maart will do all the talking. So I don’t need to worry about that and I can empty out my head and let my thoughts drift.

I like being alone. If I never had to be around another person, I’d be OK with it.

I slide the pocket door closed and my crew immediately begins chatting. This used to bother me—the idea that they would hold things in when I was around, but talk freely when I wasn’t.

I hate it. I really do. But I’ve learned to live with it. I can’t change who I am.

Maybe I could’ve. Twenty-two years ago, I might’ve been able to change, if things had gone differently.

But that chance slipped out of my control a long way back. And anyway, even if I could change, no one would stop seeing me as the killer they know me to be. So whatever.

I strip out of my traveling clothes and lie down on the bottom bunk naked. Then I close my eyes and think about that girl as my hand drifts down the hard muscles of my stomach. I pause, then reach for my already stiffening cock and start to tug on it.

I liked the way she looked in that window. She was a mystery.

I liked the way her face was lit up with the late-day sunshine.

I liked her pouty lips and I picture what it would feel like to have them wrapped around my shaft.

I breathe a little harder as the fantasy takes hold. My cock grows stiffer as the dream takes shape.

I liked her silence, too. I could hear it immediately. It’s just like mine.

She is just like me. Damaged and broken. Hurt and sore. Used and discarded.

But that laugh—that was truly unexpected. I liked the way she laughed. I liked the small hint of joy in that outburst and I wonder how attached she is to Pavo.