And she was a stronger woman than she'd been a year ago, or even five months ago when Zach had sauntered into her hospital room. She'd learned from him how to strengthen her dreams with a solid focus.
They'd accomplished their goals in marrying in half the time they'd thought they needed, which should be cause for rejoicing. Except now, there wasn't anything holding them together. No more crises to solve or major single-parenting hardships to wade through.
Now, there wasn't anything to stop her from leaving.
* * *
"You're leaving, aren't you?" Zach said quietly over his shoulder to Julia without taking his eyes off Patrick asleep in the crib. Exhaustion pumped through him after his longest day on record since he'd walked into Julia's hospital room. Her light tread sounded along the hardwood floors, then muffled on the rug as she eased closer. Stopping beside him, she didn't answer, just stared down at the sleeping baby with him.
While he wanted to hope she would disagree, he knew better. He might have salvaged something with Shelby, thanks to Julia's intervention, but he'd blown it with Julia by losing his temper in the hotel room. By the whole damned way he'd handled the flight. If only he could have kept control, thought through his words to fix the fact that he should have been straight with her about Lance's crash. But damn it, Julia stirred emotions that weren't calm or even rational.
Her scent swirled around him, strawberry shampoo and fresh air. "We've accomplished what we set out to do with the children. They're back on track."
He noticed she didn't flat-out state she planned to leave. He pushed that advantage to the wall. "Why tear that apart now?"
He'd reclaimed his daughter, but would he lose a wife again? And this time, he would lose a child too if his marriage ended. Patrick might not be his biological son, but the boy couldn't be any more his if he'd fathered him.
"If I stay any longer, it will only be worse when I leave. Shelby expects me to go now.
Ivy's excited about having her mother home so this won't hit her as hard."
"You're deluding yourself on that one, Jules."
She didn't answer, just patted her son's back. Zach tucked the blanket around Patrick's feet, using the familiar ritual to steady himself while he thought through ways to convince her, something he could do to make her stay. "What about Patrick?"
"I'll miss being with him all day, but I'm stronger now, more confident in myself and the support system I have in place."
"That's not what I meant." Stirrings of residual anger edged past his exhaustion. "Don't you think Patrick will miss me? Or that I'll miss him?"
Her grip on the edge of the crib whitened. "It will be harder for him the longer he has to grow attached to you."
Zach grasped her shoulders and turned her toward him, finding her face as pale as that tight-knuckled grip. "If you're so much stronger now, then give us a chance."
Patrick stirred, snuffled, then stilled with a sigh.
Julia's eyes slid back to Zach. "Do you think this is easy for me?" she whispered, her words laced with frustration. "I want to do what's best for the children."
"Bull."
"What? I can't believe you said that to me."
She tried to inch back but he held firm.
"Hell, Jules, I'll say it again if it will make you listen." He could see she was three seconds away from packing her high tops and swiping all those bottles of polish right off his dresser, into her bag and out of his world. "You won't stay because you're too scared to try. Fantasies are easy. Real life is hard. At least be honest."
"You want honest? Yes, I'm scared." She met him toe-to-toe, pain and pride stamped on her pale face. "So reassure me with a reason to stick around that has nothing to do with the children."
His hands fell away. A trick question? Regardless, he knew if he answered wrong, those polish bottles would be clanking their way into her suitcase within minutes. "I've given you solid reasons to stay."
"Not the one I want."
Okay, so she needed a reason to stay. The bottles received clemency for a few minutes longer. If he just knew what it was she wanted him to say. "Help me out here, Jules. I want to get this right, but I'm stumbling around in the dark."
"If I have to tell you, it doesn't count."
Ah, hell. He was screwed. Zach jammed the heels of his hands to his forehead.
"Women!"