He replaced the photo, sliding a crystal ring dish to the side and out of her tossing reach, a smile playing with his dimples.
Damn it, she would not be charmed by his quiet humor. Not now. His dimple deepened.
Maybe she was a little charmed.
She closed the distance between them and flattened a hand to his chest. "It's free at the base clinic, covered as part of your benefits. Family Advocacy is there for a reason."
How could dimples turn to a scowl so quickly? "I'm not putting my problems on record there."
"Confidentiality applies."
"Yeah, right. Until someone sees me walking out of there. Fliers can't afford a hint of personal problems."
"And a broken marriage isn't a hint?"
"No."
Deep breaths. She toyed with straightening his collar while she regulated her breathing and organized her thoughts. "All right, you have a real problem with counseling. I'm trying not to be insulted that you think so little of my career field."
"Don't look for a fight." He lifted her hand from his chest and pressed a kiss against her wrist, playing havoc with her heartbeat. "Let's both take time off from work, spend it with the kids and each other like you wanted before. I'd already decided during my flight tonight to take leave."
His concession surprised her, big-time, since it would involve dipping into her paycheck to finance the trip, a definite step forward for them. Enough to relent? Hoping that she could soften him up later on the counseling issue?
If only he weren't nipping at the sensitive inside of her wrist in an obvious, calculated effort to distract her. "And we would go somewhere. We would use our money to pay for it."
"Yeah, sure." He dropped her hand and made a big freaking production out of brushing away a few dead leaves from around the base of a begonia plant in the window. "Let's rent that cabin like you wanted to for Christmas. We can have that family time together once Nikki and Chris finish up exams."
He'd agreed, even if the prospect left him looking itchier than one of her kids after a roll in poison ivy. Why couldn't she stop reading something into the fact that his restless movements straightening things in the room took him closer and closer to the hall?
The vent by the door captured his attention and he stretched up to adjust the open/shut lever. "Or if the cabin thing doesn't appeal for summer, make whatever arrangements you want. Anything's fine by me."
His left foot landed in the hall.
"Since you're walking out the door, does that mean I get to throw something?"
That stopped him. He looked back over his shoulder. Turned. "Real funny, Rena. I'm trying to be accommodating."
"Accommodating? Sounds to me like you're trying to placate me so you can get the hell out of the room." Deeper breaths. "This is exactly what I'm talking about when I mention marriage counseling. We could probably use some family counseling, too, with Chris's situation."
"Well, hell," he snapped. "Didn't we get anything right?" Old habits slid into place too easily and she refused to let them take over. "I'll ignore that comment since I'm trying here. But it's obvious you're only agreeing to the vacation to placate me."
"You won." He crossed his arms over his chest. "Be happy."
Bad-body-language alert. And her temper was sparking, ripe and ready for anything to fuel it to life. Two weeks of holding her tongue, walking on eggshells, terrified to hope and terrified not to, all sliced at her paper-thin control. "I won? Good God, do you hear yourself? It's not about winning. It's about both of us being happy."
"I'm happy if you're not pitching plates."
"You deserve more than that and so do I. I want us to go to marriage counseling."
His arms unfolded and he gripped the top of the door frame, the hall sealed from sight. "Oh, I see how it is. I agree to what you ask by talking—like how I'm finally agreeing to the vacation you wanted so damn bad last year. So you up the request until I say no. Then it's my fault things fell apart."
Was there truth in that? Maybe. But if so, then it only solidified her surety that they needed help. "How could you think I would wish for this hell? Don't you realize how much our split hurt me? More so the second time, even, coming so close on the heels of what happened overseas. Do you have any clue what it was like thinking you'd died? Imagining what was happening to you if you hadn't?"
His hands fisted against the frame.
"We were both a mess when you came home. And as much as I want to hope nothing bad ever happens to us again, that's unrealistic." The fear of a repeat swamped her until she used the excuse of her sore ankle to sit on the edge of their bed. "We need to be rock solid to face the future. We need to be open with each other, not just winning and losing. Do you realize you still haven't even told me what happened over there yet?"
"We already covered that in the truck."