Shoving a fistful of chips into her mouth, Lucia clambered down. Sara watched until her daughter reached Lucas's side and tugged on his hand. He glanced down, his face softening as he reached to scoop her up. He returned his attention to the discussion with his aviators, his face serious again, but his hold on Lucia gentle.
Her daughter was in good hands, even if those airmen were gawking at their commander as though he'd suddenly sprouted a third arm.
They'd obviously never seen the tender man who discussed bug cuisine with a frightened and confused child. She'd spent so long wondering why he didn't reveal more of his heart to her, never fully realizing how much more of himself he gave to her than to anyone else.
Sara pressed the phone to her ear again. "Ramon didn't hurt me. Physically I'm fine. It could have been so much worse."
"Sure." Sarcasm dripped through the phone lines. "He only stole five years from you, from all of us who love you. Just because he didn't beat you up or—uh— abuse you, that still doesn't make any of this okay," her brother barked with hoarse gruffness that cut new wounds on her heart. "I'm mad as hell and want somebody to pay."
His gasping breaths filled the phone lines.
"Tomas, hermano—" brother "—I'm all right—"
"Stop. This is not okay, and if you think it is, then I'm even more worried about you. You really need to be careful. You know? Go to some of those decompression sessions, find a support group, like Alcoholics Anonymous. Or even one for all of us to attend together."
Her chest went tight, breathing constricted again. "We can talk about that later."
A shuddering breath echoed. "You're right. I shouldn't be ragging on you now."
"You're sweet to worry about me."
"Hey, you're the one who married a guy to keep me safe."
Partly. She'd also married Lucas because she'd loved him. And now? How did she feel? Back to all of those decisions again. "I married Lucas because I wanted to."
"What happens with you and Lucas now?"
"I'll let you know as soon as we figure it out."
"Sarafina?"
"Yes?"
"Since you, uh, died—or we thought you died—I never saw or heard of Lucas dating anyone. I even asked him about it a couple of times, and he always said he was too busy with work. I just thought you would want to know that."
No one?
She couldn't help but stare at Lucas with a fresh perspective. He'd said he grieved for her, but she would have thought he would move on to other relationships. Even if jealousy stung, she understood it was unrealistic to expect him to be faithful to marriage vows when she was "dead."
But he hadn't dated anyone?
Of course Tomas hadn't been with him all the time. Either way she didn't want to care about the answer so much. She didn't want to be so totally swept away by how right Lucas looked holding Lucia and shifting from foot to foot in that universal lull-a-child rocking motion. Such a precious contrast to the stoic leader.
Apparently she didn't have any more control over her feelings now than she'd had over her life recently. She prayed that with her currently messed-up mind she could get past this panicky sense of foreboding that Ramon would burst into the room at any moment. That he would snatch Lucia or shoot Lucas.
Dlos mio, she needed air, fresh air. Couldn't someone open a window?
She gripped the phone tighter. Surely she was being paranoid. After all Tomas's talk about needing counseling and her own fears that she couldn't make a decision, she should leave protection from Ramon in the hands of the experts.
Chapter 14
Damn, it felt good to be in an Air Force flight suit again.
Lucas strode down the narrow corridor at the Cartina National Air Base after mission planning tomorrow night's return flight to Charleston. His clothes had been exactly where he'd left them, in his room. How full circle to be here again. Yet because of a blown-up bridge, he'd been forced to take such a roundabout route back.
Sara had been close to help for so long and no one in this godforsaken country had looked farther than their noses to help her.
Scratch that. The Cartinians had been making strides to clean up their boundaries, the Aragon situation and this op, both a case in point. He only wished the local government had taken care of the problem years ago.