Actually, she could, except he wouldn't be out there where people could see him. He would hide his goodness where no one noticed until someday they had a whole library of tapes and photos. "It's a fun image."
"He always bought the sports picture package, the big one with the team shot and individual in a banner thing. He spent the games just watching."
"He came to your games?" Her eyes trekked to Lucas giving his undivided attention to each crew member. She owed this wonderful man so much more than she could ever repay.
"Whenever he could. A lot of times he was out of the country on TDYs and deployments. He's been over in the Middle East and helping with the tsunami destruction in Indonesia. Do you know what's been going on over in those regions?" He hesitated, a chair squeaking in the background. "I mean, did Tio Ramon—"
"Did he keep me locked up in a cell with bread, water and no television?" She tried for levity. It didn't work for either of them. "I had access to newspapers, magazines and a limited amount of television. Computers, but no Internet or phones out."
He whistled low and long. 'That's so freaky weird."
She wanted to hug him and reassure him as she did with Lucia. The best she could offer were words for now—words Lucia probably shouldn't hear.
"Hold on a moment," she said, before clutching the receiver to her chest and whispering to her daughter, "Go see Papa for a minute, chica."
Shoving a fistful of chips into her mouth, Lucia clambered down. Sara watched until her daughter reached Lucas's side and tugged on his hand. He glanced down, his face softening as he reached to scoop her up. He returned his attention to the discussion with his aviators, his face serious again, but his hold on Lucia gentle.
Her daughter was in good hands, even if those airmen were gawking at their commander as though he'd suddenly sprouted a third arm.
They'd obviously never seen the tender man who discussed bug cuisine with a frightened and confused child. She'd spent so long wondering why he didn't reveal more of his heart to her, never fully realizing how much more of himself he gave to her than to anyone else.
Sara pressed the phone to her ear again. "Ramon didn't hurt me. Physically I'm fine. It could have been so much worse."
"Sure." Sarcasm dripped through the phone lines. "He only stole five years from you, from all of us who love you. Just because he didn't beat you up or—uh— abuse you, that still doesn't make any of this okay," her brother barked with hoarse gruffness that cut new wounds on her heart. "I'm mad as hell and want somebody to pay."
His gasping breaths filled the phone lines.
"Tomas, hermano—" brother "—I'm all right—"
"Stop. This is not okay, and if you think it is, then I'm even more worried about you. You really need to be careful. You know? Go to some of those decompression sessions, find a support group, like Alcoholics Anonymous. Or even one for all of us to attend together."
Her chest went tight, breathing constricted again. "We can talk about that later."
A shuddering breath echoed. "You're right. I shouldn't be ragging on you now."
"You're sweet to worry about me."
"Hey, you're the one who married a guy to keep me safe."
Partly. She'd also married Lucas because she'd loved him. And now? How did she feel? Back to all of those decisions again. "I married Lucas because I wanted to."
"What happens with you and Lucas now?"
"I'll let you know as soon as we figure it out."
"Sarafina?"
"Yes?"
"Since you, uh, died—or we thought you died—I never saw or heard of Lucas dating anyone. I even asked him about it a couple of times, and he always said he was too busy with work. I just thought you would want to know that."
No one?
She couldn't help but stare at Lucas with a fresh perspective. He'd said he grieved for her, but she would have thought he would move on to other relationships. Even if jealousy stung, she understood it was unrealistic to expect him to be faithful to marriage vows when she was "dead."
But he hadn't dated anyone?
Of course Tomas hadn't been with him all the time. Either way she didn't want to care about the answer so much. She didn't want to be so totally swept away by how right Lucas looked holding Lucia and shifting from foot to foot in that universal lull-a-child rocking motion. Such a precious contrast to the stoic leader.