Locking her arms around Jacob’s neck, she explored the breadth of his shoulders as his restless hands slipped beneath her coat to her back, down her waist. God he was big, yet no longer intimidating as she’d feared the first time her eyes traveled up the length of him. She’d learned he used his size for protection rather than intimidation.
Dee snuggled closer, couldn’t get close enough. Without breaking their kiss, Jacob lowered her to the quilt and blanketed her with his body as their legs tangled. Dee danced her tongue against his, learning the taste of Jacob, which only served to send her into another dizzying spiral of pure sensation.
They rolled until she landed on top, and she found she liked it there. Jacob shifted to take her weight fully upon him. She liked that even more, Jacob allowing her some control for a change, even in such a fundamental way.
A clatter rumbled along the truck bed. Dee tried to block out what she didn’t want to hear. The beer bottle clanked, spinning until it shattered against the icy parking lot.
“Jacob—”
“I’ll clean it up later.” He nuzzled her neck again, but the moment had been broken, as well.
Realization chilled Dee more than the frost in the air. What was she doing? Not five minutes ago she’d been sharing memories of the family she’d most likely left behind, and now she was crawling all over Jacob like some sex-starved teenager because of Valentine’s Day sentimentality.
Dee pushed herself up beside him. Jacob blinked twice before flinging his arm over his face.
His arm fell away. “I’m s—”
“Don’t say you’re sorry.” She hugged her knees to her chest in counterpressure against an ache with Jacob’s name tattooed all over it. “I’m the one who should apologize.”
Jacob jackknifed up as he raked his hands through his hair. It wasn’t long hair, but she’d managed to make a fine mess of it all the same, just like she’d done with her life. And might do with his if she wasn’t careful.
“What is it with me, Jacob? I told myself it didn’t matter what had happened before, only what I do now, but I can’t even keep my hands off you for a week. I barely know anything about you, like your favorite ice cream or why your friends call you Mako.” She squeezed her knees harder, pushing all the air free until she could only whisper, “What kind of a woman am I?”
He grasped her chin, his grip a fraction past gentle. “I don’t know what the hell was going on in your life before you came here, either. But regardless of how long we’ve spent together, I do know who you are, the person that’s real, underneath any layer of memories.” His touch gentled to a caress. “There’s an innocence and goodness in you that’s rare, special. Don’t doubt it for a minute.”
She wanted to believe him, yearned to grasp his words with both hands and accept them simply because Jacob said so. But that kind of blind faith, a dependency, also raked over an innately pragmatic part of her.
She had to prove to herself she wasn’t simply a “Mrs. Smith” who drooled over any man. “Then why do I want to lie back on that blanket and finish this?”
Jacob’s jaw flexed.
Dee’s shivered in response. “Not smart, huh?”
“Nope.” His hand shook as he hooked her hair behind her ear. A lone trailer of the Northern Lights shimmered across the sky. “I think you should go inside now.”
“Right. Of course.” She scrambled toward the tailgate.
“Dee?”
She glanced over her shoulder. Heaven help her if he called her back. “Yes?”
“Butter pecan ice cream. And Mako started out as Maaco, like the auto repair company, because I can fix any engine on any vehicle. Later the spelling tweaked to Mako, as in the shark, because it sounds cool.” He tipped back his head, eyes tipped toward the stars, conversation over.
His words settled into her memory along with his assertion that he knew her very well, regardless of time. She wanted…She didn’t know what.
A final look at Jacob confirmed he’d withdrawn from her. How remote he seemed, with those shadows muting the vibrancy of his beautiful eyes like the aurora lighting the sky then slipping away leaving the world feeling colder and darker than before.
In spite of all her intentions to be his friend while she pieced her life together, she’d done it again. She’d thrown herself at him. It didn’t matter that he’d made the first move tonight. She hadn’t thought to push him away for a long time.
Still wished she hadn’t pushed him away at all.
Dee scrambled out of the truck and raced as fast as she dared through the sludge back toward the warm safety and stark isolation of her hotel room.
Dee sank deeper into the soothing bubble bath, then jolted as she realized the water had cooled. How long had she been in here since tearing off her clothes to soak after the frustrating encounter with Jacob in his truck?
She swiped at the remaining few frothy patches of soap. She must have drifted off. Too bad she couldn’t wake up and find this whole time had been some freaky nightmare.
Except she wouldn’t want to wish away Jacob.