The Truth (Discworld 25)

He lay down on the narrow bed in the dark (Mrs Arcanum supplied one candle weekly, and what with one thing and another he had forgotten to buy any extra) and tried to think.

Mr Slant walked across the floor of the empty ballroom, his feet echoing on the wood.

He took his position in the circle of candlelight with a slight twanging of nerves. As a zombie, he was always a little edgy about fire.

He coughed.

'Well?' said a chair.

'They didn't get the dog,' said Mr Slant. Tn all other respects, I have to say, they did a masterly job.'

'How bad could it be if the Watch find it?'

'As I understand it, J:he dog in question is quite old,' said Mr Slant, into the candlelight. 'I have instructed Mr Pin to look for it, but I don't believe he will find it easy to get access to the city's canine underground.'

'There are other werewolves here, aren't there?'

'Yes,' said Mr Slant smoothly. 'But they won't help. There are very few of them, and Sergeant Angua of the Watch is very important in the werewolf community. They won't help strangers, because she will find out.'

'And bring the Watch down on them?'

'I believe she would not bother with the Watch,' said Slant.

The dog is probably in some dwarf's stewpot by now,' said a chair. There was general laughter.

'If things go... wrong,' said a chair, 'who do these men know?'

They know me,' said Mr Slant. 'I would not worry unduly. Vimes works by the rules.'

'I've always understood him to be a violent and vicious man,' said a chair.

'Quite so. And because this is what he knows himself to be, he always works by the rules. In any case, the Guilds will be meeting tomorrow.'

'Who will be the new Patrician?' said a chair.

That will be a matter for careful discussion and the consideration of all shades of opinion,' said Mr Slant. His voice could have oiled watches.

'Mr Slant?' said a chair.

'Yes?'

'Do not try that on us. It is going to be Scrope, isn't it?'

'Mr Scrope is certainly well thought of by many of the leading figures in the city,' said the lawyer.

'Good.'

And the musty air was loud with unspoken conversation.

Absolutely no one needed to say: A lot of the most powerful men in the city owe their positions to Lord Vetinari.

And nobody replied: Certainly. But to the kind of men who seek power, gratitude has very poor keeping qualities. The kind of men who seek power tend to deal with matters as they are. They would never try to depose Vetinari, but if he was gone then they would be practical.

No one said: Will anyone speak up for Vetinari?

Silence replied: Oh, everyone. They'll say things like: 'Poor fellow... it was the strain of office, you know.' They'll say: 'It's the quiet ones that crack.' They'll say: 'Quite so... We should put him somewhere where he can do no harm to himself or others. Don't you think?' They'll say: 'Perhaps a small statue would be in order, too?' They'll say: The least we can do is call off the Watch, we owe him that much.' They'll say: 'We must look to the future.' And so, quietly, things change. No fuss, and very little mess.

No one said: Character assassination. What a wonderful idea. Ordinary assassination only works once, but this one works every day.