The Truth (Discworld 25)

Mr Pin's face appeared in his limited vision.

'I said,' said Mr Pin, 'that Mr Slant wants to see us...'

'Sngh,' said the clerk. Mr Pin nodded and the pressure was relieved slightly.

'Sorry? You were saying?' said Mr Pin, watching the man's hand creep along the edge of the desk.

'He's... not... seeing... anyone...' The words ended in a muffled yelp.

Mr Pin leaned down. 'Sorry about the fingers,' he said, 'but we can't have them naughty little things creeping to that little lever there, can we? No telling what might happen if you pulled that lever. Now... which one's Mr Slant's office?'

'Second... door... on... left...' the man groaned.

'See? It's so much nicer when we're polite. And in a week, two at the outside, you'll be able to pick up a pen again.' Mr Pin nodded to Mr Tulip, who let the man go. He slithered to the floor.

'You want I should --ing scrag him?'

'Leave him,' said Mr Pin. 'I think I'm going to be nice to people today.'

He had to hand it to Mr Slant. When the New Firm stepped into his office the lawyer looked up and his expression barely flickered.

'Gentlemen?' he said.

'Don't press a --ing thing,' said Mr Tulip.

'There's something you should know,' said Mr Pin, pulling a box out of his jacket.

'And what is that?' said Mr Slant.

Mr Pin flicked a catch on the side of the box.

'Let's hear about yesterday,' he said.

The imp blinked.

'... nyip... nyapnyip... nyapdit... nyip...' it said.

'It's just working its way backwards,' said Mr Pin.

'What is this?' said the lawyer.

'... nyapnyip... sipnyap... nip... is valuable, Mr Pin. So I will not spin this out. What did you do with the dog? Mr Pin's finger touched another lever. '... wheedlewheedle whee... My... clients have long memories and deep pockets. Other killers can be hired. Do you understand me?

There was a tiny 'Ouch' as the Off lever hit the imp on the head.

Mr Slant got up and walked across to an ancient cabinet.

'Would you like a drink, Mr Pin? I am afraid I have only embalming fluid

'Not yet, Mr Slant.'

'... and I think I probably have a banana somewhere

Mr Slant turned, smiling beatifically, at the sound of the smack of Mr Pin catching Mr Tulip's arm.

'I told you I'm gonna --ing kill him--'

'Too late, alas,' said the lawyer, sitting down again. 'Very well, Mr Pin. This is about money, is it?'