Feet of Clay (Discworld 19)

GOLEM MUST HAVE A MASTER.

Carrot sighed. Men had to breathe, fish had to swim, golems had to have a master. 'I don't know if I can sort this out, but no one else is going to try, believe me,' he said.

Dorfl did not move.

Carrot went back to where he had been standing. 'I'm wondering if the old priest and Mr Hopkinson did something ... or helped to do something,' he said, watching the golem's face. 'I'm wondering if... afterwards... something turned against them, found the world a bit too much...'

Dorfl remained impassive.

Carrot nodded. 'Anyway, you're free to go. What happens now is up to you. I'll help you if I can. If a golem is a thing then it can't commit murder, and I'll still try to find out why all this is happening. If a golem can commit murder, then you are people, and what is being done to you is terrible and must be stopped. Either way, you win, Dorfl.' He turned his back and fiddled with some papers on his desk. 'The big trouble,' he added, 'is that everyone wants someone else to read their minds for them and then make the world work properly. Even golems, perhaps.'

He turned back to face the golem. 'I know you've all got a secret. But, the way things are going, there won't be any of you left to keep it.'

He looked hopefully at Dorfl.

NO. CLAY OF MY CLAY. I WILL NOT BETRAY.

Carrot sighed. 'Well, I won't force you.' He grinned. 'Although, you know, I could. I could write a few extra words on your chem. Tell you to be talkative.'

The fires rose in Dorfl's eyes.

'But I won't. Because that would be inhumane. You haven't murdered anyone. I can't deprive you of your freedom because you haven't got any. Go on. You can go. It's not as if I don't know where you live.'

TO WORK IS TO LIVE.

'What is it golems want, Dorfl? I've seen you golems walking around the streets and working all the time, but what is it you actually hope to achieve?'

The slate pencil scribbled.

RESPITE.

Then Dorfl turned around and walked out of the building,

'D*mn!' said Carrot, a difficult linguistic feat. He drummed his fingers on the desk, then got up abruptly, put his clothing back on and stalked down the corridor to find Angua.

She was leaning against the wall in Corporal Littlebottom's office, talking to the dwarf.

'I've sent Dorfl home,' said Carrot.

'Has he got one?' said Angua.

'Well, back to the slaughterhouse, anyway. But it's probably not a good time for a golem to be out alone so I'm just going to stroll along after him and keep... Are you all right, Corporal Little-bottom?'

'Yes, sir,' said Cheri.

'You're wearing a. ..a. ..a...' Carrot's mind rebelled at the thought of what the dwarf was wearing and settled for: 'A kilt?'

'Yes, sir. A skirt, sir. A leather one, sir.'

Carrot tried to find a suitable response and had to resort to:'Oh.'

'I'll come with you,' said Angua. 'Cheri can keep an eye on the desk.'

'A ... kilt,' said Carrot. 'Oh. Well, er ... just keep an eye on things. We won't be long. And... er ... just keep behind the desk, all right?'

'Come on,' said Angua.

When they were out in the fog Carrot said, 'Do you think there's something a bit ... odd about Littlebottom?'