“You had me.”
“But don’t you see? That’s the catch-22. If I told you, he would have killed her.”
I take a step closer to Matteo. To my husband, who has promised to help. “When Matteo came to me, I thought this could be it. He would have the power to stop this. It took me a long time to trust him, but when I was finally ready to ask him for help, Marco’s place was raided. Was that you?” I ask Julia.
For the first time since she has been brought down here, she looks down at the floor. She is finally starting to understand what her actions cost her.
I understand what mine have cost. I will always feel the pain in my heart.
“Why?” the soft voice sounds foreign coming from Jonathan. It reminds me of the little boy I once knew. The one who used to play with me and Julia, my once friend. “Why would he lie? Why would he keep her there? It doesn’t make sense.” He starts to ramble to himself. I can’t make out most of it, but one thing is clear. I have always wondered the same question.
I turn to Jonathan. “This has plagued me for months. This same question. When I found out he lied to me and that she wasn’t dead, I asked myself why. What good was it to spin this web of lies? What did he have to gain?”
“What did you find out?” Julia asks.
Even though it hurts, I start to pace.
“Nothing. I couldn’t find out anything. I wasn’t sure if what I had read was true. The moment I saw the intake papers he had, I should have come to you guys, but by that time—"
“He was blackmailing you?” she asks.
“I wish you would have told me,” Matteo says.
I nod. “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you. I just—” Matteo steps up to me, tilts my head up, and places a kiss on my lips.
“I didn’t deserve your trust. I would have used her against you too.”
I shake my head. “You wouldn’t have.”
His brow arches, and I know he doesn’t see the man I do. The man I love.
“I’m sorry,” Julia says from behind me, and I move to face her. “I-I.” Her eyes are focused at my stomach, and where the bulky bandage is clearly visible through my shirt. “You could have died. Jonathan and I—”
I lift my hand to silence her. “This isn’t your fault. It’s mine.”
“Like fuck it isn’t,” Matteo interjects. His voice rough with anger. “They tried to kill you.”
“I do believe we were actually trying to kill him.”
“Speak for yourself. I was trying to kill both of them.” We all turn around to face Jonathan. He shrugs from his cell. “No reason to lie. I was. Now that I know the truth, I obviously feel like shit, but it’s the truth nonetheless.”
Everything feels so confusing, my legs start to sway under me.
Matteo catches me in his arms, and before I know it, Roberto is pulling a chair under me to sit in.
“Are you okay?” Matteo is now eye level with me. Staring at me like he’s afraid I’m going to die.
“I’m fine.” I reach my hand out and touch his jaw. “Let Jonathan go.” My words shock even me, but in truth, now that the truth is out there, I’m not afraid of him. If anyone should be afraid, it’s my father.
“Are you insane?” I level my eyes on him. “Viviana, I can’t let him go.”
I look over Matteo’s shoulder, staring directly at Jonathan now. “Can he let you go? Are you going to kill us?”
Jonathan looks tired—not just physically but also mentally.
“I’m not going to hurt either of you.”
“No.” Matteo’s voice is louder than I expect. “He hurt you.”
“Look at it from his side. He thought I killed his mother. What would you do if you had a chance to kill the person who killed yours?”
Matteo’s hand wraps around my arm and pulls me out, away from everyone.
“It doesn’t stop me from wanting to kill him for hurting you.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t know!” His anger no longer sizzles on the surface. Now, it’s a raging inferno, one I’m not sure how to douse. “I thought I lost you. I thought you died. You are everything to me. You are my life. Do you hear me? You are my life.”
I lift my hand up and touch his jaw. His rigid jaw that I think will snap in half. “It’s okay. I’m okay.”
His head hangs down. “You could have died, and it was because of me. I didn’t protect you.”
“I forgive you, Matteo. Now it’s time you forgive yourself. I love you. You can’t hold this inside you.” Taking his hand, I walk us back to stand in front of the cage.
“I can’t let him go. I can’t get over that he tried to take you from me.”