As quietly as I can, I get up from the bed and find some of my clothes as I go. I get dressed quickly in the living room then grab my bag and see the time. I should have more than enough time to get home and get ready for work as long as I hurry.
In the taxi on the way home, I think back to his comment about us not using protection. It never crossed my mind until he brought it up, but the chance of anything happening has to be slim. It was only the one time, but what if? Would he be upset if I got pregnant? We barely know each other, and I roll my eyes because I’m getting way ahead of myself.
When I open my front door, Avery is standing there with a smirk on his face. “Oh look, someone is doing the walk of shame,” he teases me.
“There’s no shame here.” I wink at him, making him laugh.
“Good.” He holds up his hand, and I give him a high five before I head to my room so I can get ready for work.
I don’t want to wash away the smell of Bastian, but maybe he’ll put it back on me tonight if he asks me to come over again. I tell myself I’m not going to be clingy as I blow dry my hair and get ready for work.
I’m going to play it cool. I can totally be cool. I imagine the sound of Juno laughing, as if she were here to hear me say it.
When I walk into the living room, there’s a pounding on the front door.
“Who’s knocking like a fucking cop?” Avery asks, walking over to the front door and pulling it open.
“Who the fuck are you?” I hear Bastian’s voice boom from the doorway.
“I think this one is yours,” Avery says, his tone dry and not at all upset.
“Hi.” I wave to Bastian, who is glaring at Avery. I get that this might look bad because Avery is only in a pair of sweatpants, and he’s also a model.
“I’m the roommate, bro. Cool it. Besides, she's not my type. But if you play your cards right, you might be.”
Bastian's face turns from angry to surprised. “Sorry, but I’m taken,” he answers and turns his sights on me.
“The good ones always are.” Avery winks at me before heading back to his room to leave us alone.
“You snuck out.” Bastian says it like an accusation.
“I came home to get ready for work.” I motion to my clothes. The more I take Bastian in, the more I can tell he got ready in a hurry.
“You came straight here?” he asks.
“Yes.”
“And you’re heading straight to work? No stops?”
“What is with the weird questions?” I ask as he walks toward me and wraps me in his arms.
“I didn't use protection last night.” I nod because he already said this. “I thought maybe you went to get the morning-after pill or something.” My stomach tightens. Is he going to push for me to get one now?
“No. I came straight home.”
“Thank god,” he says, surprising the hell out of me.
Before I can say anything else, he’s kissing me until the only thought swimming in my head is whether what I feel for Bastian might be love.
12
Bastian
“Oh god, Bastian,” Lux whispers as I keep licking her clit. “I can’t be quiet.”
I don’t stop, tonguing her little bud over and over until she finally falls apart. She puts her hand over her mouth and whimpers into it. I know the door to the copy room is locked, and nobody is going to come in here, even if she cries out my name.
I taste her climax and it’s so fucking sweet, but then again, every part of her is like candy. My cock swells, and I press the heel of my hand against it to get it to calm down. I already had her this morning and then again in my office as soon as we got here, so he needs to chill.
It’s been a week of complete bliss with Lux, and every second is better than the one before. Not only because we’re fucking as often as we can, but because I’ve never been happier. I laugh now, and I didn’t realize I wasn’t doing that before her. I’m also waking up with a smile on my face and not just because I get to sink deep into her, but because I get up early just to watch her sleep. She’s the first thing I see every morning and the last thing I see before I fall asleep, and it’s still not enough.
Last night after drifting off, I told her I love her. I want to say it when she’s awake, but I’m so afraid I’ll scare her off. She keeps telling me she’s not going anywhere, and maybe it’s my own insecurities, but I’m terrified to imagine having every single thing I want. What if I don’t get it? Or even scarier, what if I do, and I can’t hold on to it? Losing my mother, the person who influenced me most in life, is what makes me worried that Lux will slip through my fingers, when losing my mother should be the thing that propels me to live my life without regret.