Mia slams the door behind her, and I peek up at her. She moves into the room and stands over me, with her hands on her hips and biting her lip. It’s hard to tell if she’s annoyed or turned on. A little bit of both, maybe?
“At least someone is making use of that mat.” Mia laughs. “Lord knows it won’t be me.”
“You should work out with me.”
She slides the messenger bag she carries everywhere off her shoulder and onto the floor next to the coffee table. “You know I’m allergic to exercise.”
Without thinking, I reach up and grab her hand. She falls forward, and as I’d planned, she collapses on top of me. Her breath hitches when she locks eyes with me. Bright blue irises stare back, causing my heart to speed up.
&
nbsp; Why does Mia have this effect on me? I should distance myself, but I want to be closer to her. And I hate myself for it.
She slides her fingers through my sweat-slick hair, pushing it off my forehead. Mia shakes her head, a smile already on her lips. “Why do you have to be you?”
“Not sure what you mean.”
“It’s just…” She turns her head away from me and sighs. “This is so hard.”
“I know.” I move my fingers beneath her chin. For what I want to say, I need her undivided attention. “I hate lying to Will. He’s my best friend and pretty much the only family I have other than my mom.” I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear and sit up, our lips almost touching. “I want you, Mia. I’ve always wanted you.”
“You were my first crush,” she admits. “My first real friend. Until you disappeared without even saying goodbye.”
I let out a frustrated groan. “We’ve gone over this more times than I can count.”
“But you never answer my question. Why did you leave? Why didn’t you have enough respect for me to say goodbye?”
“Respect?” I close my eyes and sigh, leaning my forehead against hers. “If I didn’t respect you or your brother, I would’ve kissed you ten years ago. I would’ve been your first kiss. I would’ve been your first everything.”
She gasps. “Everything?”
I nod. “Everything. I wanted it all with you, Mia, but I couldn’t have you. My life was so fucked-up back then. I wasn’t about to drag you into my mess. You were always too good for me. You still are.”
“You’re only saying this because of Will,” she challenges. “If anyone was too good, it was you, Mr. Perfect. You were good at everything. There was nothing you could say or do to make people hate you. You were the golden boy of Lower Merion High School because everyone loves you.”
I touch her cheek with my thumb, feeling her silky smooth skin. “Even you?”
She turns her head away.
“Answer me,” I demand.
She snorts. “When you answer my question, I’ll answer yours.”
Frustrated, I release my grip on her face and drop my hand to the floor. “I guess we’re at a stalemate.”
I’m not ready to reveal to truth about why I left after high school. The information could ruin my professional hockey career.
“The fact you have something to hide makes me want to know even more,” she admits.
“Which is why I won’t tell you. My life isn’t something for you to report to the world.”
“You should know me well enough by now, I would never do that to you.”
With Mia working for The Philadelphia Inquirer, I can’t take the risk. What if she told someone by accident? She could tell Clarke and think nothing of it. I know she would never hurt me on purpose, but some things are better left in the past.
“I know you wouldn’t. Can we forget about the past and think about the future instead?”
“We don’t have a future,” she spits back. “Once Will finds out about us, he’ll put an end to it.”