“Oh, I’m not sure, Zach.” It sounded like the perfect way to close out the past few shitty days. Good food, plenty of wine, and Zach. Not much more a girl could need.
“No? Not in the mood for Italian? How about Mexican?”
“No, that’s not it. It’s just, um…” Excuse time. “I’ve got so much to do here. So much to get in place before I leave.”
“Before you leave?”
“Yeah, you know that. School starts up again in Chicago in a few weeks.”
“Leave Tennessee? To go back to Chicago? Where your asshole ex is? Fuck, Toni, we haven’t even had a chance to discuss how to deal with him yet. And you’re still planning on leaving?”
Per Zach’s instructions, she’d written to Chris and told him she’d be back by the three-week deadline he’d given her. At the time, Zach told her it would give them enough time to come up with a plan to keep that video off the web without her having to go back to Chris.
“I can handle all that by myself, Zach.” Liar, liar. She didn’t have the first clue how to get herself out of that mess. “Now, more than ever, I want to help kids like me. Kids with screwed up families that are on the verge of making horrible life altering choices.”
“You’ve never once even considered the idea of staying, have you? So, I was just, what? A little something to amuse yourself with while you were on an extended vacation?”
“No, Zach, that’s not—”
He shot to his feet and rounded the desk. After yanking her to her feet he sealed his lips over hers in a kiss that almost made her forget everything she’d just said. Her nipples puckered and her panties were soaked five seconds in. She needed him like she’d never needed anyone else, and that alone was enough to make her break the kiss and step back.
“Tell me,” he said, his face a mix of lust and fury. “Tell me that you feel anything close to this with one of those pencil-pushing suits you date and I’ll let you go.”
She couldn’t, of course. She’d never felt anything close to it with any man.
“Zach, that isn’t the point. The plan has always been for me to return to my life in Chicago.” She scrunched her nose as it began to tingle, warning of the incoming flood of tears.
“Why? Because you’re too chicken shit to admit you want me. Too scared to take a risk. You’re so afraid I’m going to turn into a monster like Shark that you can’t even think about giving us a shot?”
She staggered back a few steps as his verbal slap stunned her. God, the truth hurt. And even worse, it sounded ridiculous. But he was right. She was scared. So scared.
“That’s not it, Zach,” she lied. “My life is in—”
He cut her off with an outstretched hand. “Just stop, Toni. If I have to hear you say your life is in Chicago one more time I’ll lose my shit.” He stalked toward the door. “Go. Go back to Chicago. Go back to a job that’s not what you thought it would be and your boring fucks. See if I give a shit.”
The door slammed behind him and Toni sank into her desk chair. He seemed to take all the life out of the room with him.
Why was she fighting this so hard? Toni wasn’t weak. Ever since Mark dragged her away from Shark’s gang, she’d worked her ass off to become a strong woman. Being able to handle any situation thrown at her was something she prided herself on. Yet, here she was, running away from something that could be amazing. It was like she was still that seventeen-year-old girl, fleeing from her mistakes.
But she wasn’t that girl anymore. Hadn’t been that girl for a long time. And Zach certainly wasn’t Shark. In fact, it was pretty damned insulting of her to even consider the two similar in anything beyond the fact that both had dicks.
It was time to get real and stop bullshitting herself. She wanted Zach. Hell, she was halfway in love with him.
From her desk, her phone started ringing. It was Mark’s ringtone. Her uncle just might be part psychic, somehow knowing she needed an ear.
“Hi, Uncle Mark.”
“Sweetie, what’s wrong? What the hell did that biker do to you?” Mark sounded as though he was getting ready to charge through the phone.
Despite her somber mood, she chuckled. “Why do you think something’s wrong? All I said was hello.”
“Sweetie, I know you better than anyone. You think I can’t tell your mood by your voice? You’d be wrong. Now, what’d he do?”
With a sigh, she slumped back in her office chair. “He called me on my bullshit. Made me think about what I’m doing with my life. And he asked me to stay with him.”