Her family wasn’t going to take the news that her fake engagement had ended very well. Maybe she and Heath would have to have a fake fight and a bad breakup?
“That is so good.” Gregor nodded his approval. Was it her imagination or had his accent slipped? “Astrology is a true science that helps explain the universe and our place in it.”
That was it, she was choking him with his own cape.
“Well, isn’t that lucky?” Her mother was giddy. Lyric had never seen her mother giddy and really wasn’t sure how she liked it. “Have you set a date yet?”
“A date?” Lyric turned to Heath.
“Not yet, but I’m thinking a short engagement would be best.” He winked at Lyric.
This was turning into a bigger disaster with every second that passed. So why was he egging them on?
“I’m so glad you agree. Long engagements are for the indecisive. You two are so much in love. I hate to see you waste even one minute.” Her mother turned to Gregor. “We were just looking over photos of wedding cakes. Do you or Heath have a preference?”
Lyric felt her jaw hit the floor. Her mother was actually planning the wedding … right now? It was one thing to meet with an event planner, but they were discussing actual wedding details. What was she supposed to do now? Once her mother got rolling on something, it was full steam ahead. She might actually have to marry Heath. What were the rules of annulment? Could she ask him to go all holy matrimony as long as he knew he’d come out single on the other side of it?
Her breath grew shorter the more hysterical her thoughts became. No one else seemed to notice that the room was spinning on her, but Heath put his hand in the small of her back. She wasn’t sure what it said about her—about them—that just that small touch helped to steady her.
He leaned close to her ear. “Need me to get out the prime numbers? I’ve got them right here on my phone.”
“No, thanks,” she whispered back as she patted his hand.
He squeezed her hand and smiled broadly. “I’m partial to red velvet myself.” He squeezed her hand again and then walked around to stand by her mother. “Let me see the groom’s cakes. We’re going to need something large. My teammates are big eaters.” He flipped through the binder and then closed it with an unsatisfied snap.
“I’d like a football stadium … you know, that looks like Wranglers Stadium. I want everything—from the roof that opens up, to the people in the stands. I’d like for the players to be on the field and reenacting the quarterback sneak from last year’s NFC East championship.”
Oh God, here they went. Oh yeah, this was definitely what it looked like when the inmates were running the asylum. Lyric covertly pinched herself to make sure she wasn’t still asleep and this wasn’t some hallucinogen-induced nightmare. Maybe Cherry Cherry was grilling some magic mushrooms on her radiator and the fumes had a delayed effect?
Nope, unfortunately, this was her reality. She planted a big fake smile on her face. “Heath, can I see you out in the hall, please?”
Her cheeks quivered under the weight of her smile.
“Sure thing, darlin’.” He turned to Lyric’s mother. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be right back. And when you’re thinking of a wedding date, remember the ninth. It’s my jersey number. And my lucky number.”
Lyric was afraid her head was going to explode as she followed him out into the hall. She looked around. There were way too many people within earshot. Big surprise. Now that her father was on the road to recovery, half the hospital—patients, visitors, and medical staff—was standing around hoping to get the Deuce’s autograph.
She grabbed his arm and led him to the end of the hall. “What are you doing?”
“Why are you whispering?” He was all innocence. “I’m playing along. What do you think I’m doing?”
“I don’t know, but I just want to clarify … you know we’re not really engaged, right?” It was one thing to tell her family they were engaged, but to actually plan the wedding, complete with absolutely asinine cake decorations? That was taking things way too far.
“Think about it. What better way to make sure your father recovers? You have given him a new lease on life. He wants to walk you down the aisle, and your mother needs something to worry about other than your father. It’s perfect. Everyone’s happy and your daddy is back on his feet in no time.” Heath nodded like he was especially proud of his own reasoning.
It did make a weird kind of sense … a little … maybe … if she squinted and pretended that she’d left half her brain cells in Hawaii.
“What if they start buying things for the wedding? We can’t let it go that far. And I bet Count Chocula in there is charging my mother a fortune for his crazy advice and extra s’s.” Lyric put her game face on. “I’m going in there and telling them the truth.”
Heath put a hand on her arm. “And risk your father’s health?”
All of the starch went out of her sails. “What else am I supposed to do? We can’t let this actually happen. Can we?”
“Let me talk to them and see if we can slow things down a bit.” He grinned down at her. “Everything’s going to be fine.”
She wanted to believe that, she really did. But things were starting to feel a little too real. Dread slam danced in her stomach. She’d been down this road before, and it had ended with her heart trampled under Heath’s boots. She glanced at his feet. He might be wearing flip-flops right now, but she was pretty sure that wouldn’t make it hurt any less.
* * *