I fisted my hands, wanting to scratch him up good.
I was not miserable. I was…
My heart sank, and I looked away.
He was right. What had I done since the beginning but push Will away?
I knew how it would end, so I knew better than to let it start.
“He wore you down,” Damon went on, “and you need a release. I get it.”
He approached me again, water spraying over his body as he hovered over me, imposing in a different way now that still scared me, but didn’t frighten like before.
“So take it for what it is,” he whispered. “And release with me.”
My stomach swirled. Huh?
“His infatuation will end, so pretend you’re the one in control,” Damon taunted. “Call it for what it is, because it’s sure as shit not love. It’s a crush. Hormones. Instant gratification. Acting out.”
No. It wasn’t.
Was it?
I mean, was he right? Was Will just a scratching post? Would he ever be anything more? I knew he wouldn’t.
I could do it with anyone. I could do anything I wanted to. Will wasn’t the only person I could escape with.
“You feel it, don’t you?” Damon asked. “That need kids like us feel that Will never will? That need to destroy anything good, because every man for himself, and if you can’t beat ’em, then join ’em.” He came in and caressed my hair, and my chest ached, like something wanted to tear out of it, and I just wanted the pain to end.
Even for a minute.
I wanted the control.
“That tingle between your thighs,” he panted, “that’s telling you to just let it happen, because in the backseat of my car is where you’ll be in charge.”
I trembled, tears pooling, but when he pressed his body into mine, I gasped, my eyes falling closed.
?
??And when you’re done with me,” he breathed out over my mouth, “you’ll get to be the first to walk away from something that was never going to happen anyway. You can do that with me. Don’t play with his heart. Use me, instead.”
I’d be in charge, because I’d never love Damon.
I’d never be broken.
“I’m good,” he whispered, holding my eyes. “I’m really good, Emory, and I’ll make it worth it and save you the pain of him. As long as you quit now.”
I planted my hands on his chest, entertaining what it would be like.
What it would be like to feel him on top of me.
What it would be like to kiss that mouth.
I thought about what it would be like…for a moment.
And then I blinked long and hard, clearing my throat.
He was good. I’d admit that. No wonder he got as much ass as he got, because if all anyone wanted was sex, Damon Torrance was gifted at manipulating someone’s mind. Putting the right glasses over someone’s eyes to make them see the world how he wanted them to see it.