Straight Up Love (Boys of Jackson Harbor 2)
Page 17
“I promised Ellie I’d go on a few dates before I launched Operation Pregnancy. She’s convinced I can find Mr. Right, but if I can’t—and we both know I won’t be able to—she’s going to support my plan.”
I fold my arms across my chest. “What happens if you meet someone you like? Do you tell him about your ticking clock and your baby-making plans?”
She props her hands on her hips and glares at me. She’s wearing a red Jackson Brews T-shirt and a pair of jeans that fit her like a glove. Somehow, she looks just as sexy in this as she did in the black dress she wore last night.
“I might be shitty at dating,” she says, “but I’m not that stupid. If I find someone I like . . .” Her glare falls away, and she drops her gaze to the floor. “It’s been so long that I have trouble imagining that happening, but if I did, I’d put my plans on the backburner for a while.”
“How many dates did you agree to?”
“Ellie bought me ten.”
My jaw drops. “Wow. That’s . . .”
“A lot. Tell me about it. But I figure I’ll get through most of them before school’s out, and then this summer I can launch Opera
tion Pregnancy. I’m not going to get pregnant if I don’t have a job. By summer I’ll know for sure that I’m safe from the layoffs, so a little delay will be perfect.”
Why the hell did Ellie need me to talk to Ava? She’s already got it under control. By the time Ava gets through ten dates, the shock of Harrison’s new baby and the blow of turning thirty will have worn off. It’s a genius plan, really: make Ava go on dates and remind her just what she’ll be missing out on by doing this alone.
A genius plan that might just make me lose my mind.
Jake
Sundays are for Jackson family brunch. Every Sunday we all prioritize brunch because we know it’s a chance to remember that no matter how good or bad the week before may have been to us, at the end of it all, we have each other, and family is what matters most.
With rare exception, we gather at Brayden’s house—or what is now Brayden’s. This was the house we all grew up in, but Brayden moved in here after Mom moved out to help Ethan with Lilly. Nobody was ready to sell the place, and having Brayden here makes sense, even if the house is way bigger than what a workaholic bachelor needs.
Every time I walk in the door, I’m wrapped in the warmth of sweet nostalgia. I had a good childhood. The best. And even though Brayden has remodeled a bit and replaced some of Mom’s old furniture with more contemporary pieces, I’m always taken back by the house’s smell—the pine cleaner Mom favors and Brayden uses to this day, the lavender from the front garden wafting in through the open windows.
Today, though, I walk in the door, and nostalgia is met with a rush of love when I see Dad out of the corner of my eye. For a beat, right before I turn, before I can even take a breath, I think my father is really there. Just for a second, I can anticipate the warmth of his smile and the feel of his hand as he gives the back of my neck a reassuring squeeze.
Even as I turn, I realize it’s Brayden, not Dad, who’s standing in the living room. My eldest brother is as tall as Dad was, and has the same dark hair and broad shoulders, but while he resembles my father, he could never pass for him. It’s just my mind playing tricks on me. Again.
This happens every once in a while. I think I see my father and forget that’s not possible, that he’s been gone for years. The moments pass as quickly as they come, but the ache in my chest isn’t as easy to shake off.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Brayden says.
I exhale heavily. “I saw you out of the corner of my eye, and you looked like Dad.”
He doesn’t mock me; instead, he nods in understanding. My brothers and I jab at each other about anything and everything else, but never about this. Never about the grief of losing our father, or the heartache of watching our mother take her turn fighting the same battle. “I did that the other day with Ethan,” he says. “I was at the bar and I saw him from behind. I was two steps in his direction ready to say hi to Dad before I remembered that wasn’t possible.”
“I thought it’d be better by now,” I say.
Brayden nods. “It is a little bit. Used to happen to me more often, but it’s less common these days.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“Now it’s usually only when I’m feeling particularly anxious about something and have been thinking about how much I wish I could bounce an idea off him.” He studies me. “Which would explain why you did it just now.”
I frown. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I heard you had an interesting night Friday.” I don’t know what he means, and when I don’t respond, he adds, “With Ava.”
“Who told you that?” I swear, you can’t stand sideways to take a piss in this town without everyone running their mouths about it.
Brayden nods toward the kitchen. “Our brothers are in there getting a real kick out of your luck.” He smacks me between the shoulder blades, just like Dad used to do. “You might finally get your wish with Ava after all.”
I don’t know what they all think they know, but I do know I’m not in the mood to have my brothers laugh at my expense.