Dirty, Reckless Love (Boys of Jackson Harbor 3)

“You don’t owe him any explanations. If you want me to go with you to talk to him—”

I shake my head. “That’ll just make it worse.”

“Call me after?” There’s a hitch in his voice, but I don’t know what to make of it. Worry? Insecurity?

“He won’t hurt me, Levi.”

“I know. I just . . .” He shakes his head. “I don’t understand why he would have been with Molly last night.” When I squeak an objection, he holds up a hand. “I’m not doubting what you saw, but regardless of what mistakes he made, he’s not going to let you walk away from him without a fight.”

“What if there’s nothing left between us worth fighting for?”

“Ellie?” He steps forward and dips his head down, touching his forehead to mine. I close my eyes. I feel the heat of him, so close, and focus on the steady sound of his breath. In. Out. In. Out. “You aren’t in this alone.”

I’m not sure how he knew it, but those are exactly the words I needed to hear, and gratitude rushes through me and pricks the back of my eyes with tears. “Thank you.”

When he pulls back, his face is too serious. “You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now.”

“Oh.” I wait, but he doesn’t move forward or dip his head. “Are you going to?”

His gaze drops to my mouth and stays there for three booming beats of my heart. “No.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re still his.”

My heart twists. I’m not even sure what to make of that statement or what to do with the fact that I want Levi to kiss me. Colton and I haven’t even officially broken up yet, and here I am wishing for another man—this man—to put his hands and mouth on me. “He cheated on me.”

Levi gives me a sad smile, the kind that doesn’t stand a chance of making it to his eyes, and the vulnerability in his expression tugs at my heart. “You’re still his. And you will be long after you ask him to move out.” He draws in a ragged breath. “But I’ll be waiting for the moment that you’re not.”

“What the fuck is all this?”

“It’s your shit.” I prop my feet up on the ottoman and glance in Colton’s direction. He’s standing in the doorway, letting the cool air out and staring at the collection of his belongings.

Three industrial-strength black trash bags. That’s all it took to remove him from our house. When those are gone, it’ll be like he was never here.

“Why is all my shit in trash bags, Ellie?”

I shrug. My raw emotions are hibernating somewhere behind my heart, leaving me feeling numb and robotic. “Because I didn’t have any boxes. Will you please shut the door? The air’s on.”

He rubs his eyes and slams the door behind him. He’s dragging his feet like he’s exhausted. Like maybe he was too busy fucking his stepsister to bother with something as mundane as sleep.

The house was empty when I returned from Jake’s, so I started packing Colt’s things.

“You’re kicking me out?” He sets his jaw into a hard line, but when he looks at me, he does a double take. “What happened to your face?”

“I tripped down some stairs.” Anger unravels from my chest at the reminder, and I let it, feeling my cheeks heat and my fingertips tingle with indignation. You cheated on me, you asshole. “Do you want me to help you carry this stuff out?”

He shakes his head. “Just because I didn’t come home last night? Because I partied a little too much? What? Are you my mother now?”

“It’s not because you didn’t come home. It’s because of where you stayed. And with whom.” I want to pull my hair out and scream at him. Instead, I grab a magazine from the basket by the couch and start flipping through it as if it’s just another day. As if this conversation isn’t sending sharp slivers of my heart right through my lungs.

“What do you mean?” He shoves a bag to the side and walks into the living room, sinking onto the couch beside me. He really does look as exhausted as I feel. “You’re kicking me out because I was with Molly?”

“Pretty much.”

“Does it matter if I wasn’t fucking her? Do you even care?” His questions make me want to crumble, to believe anything he’ll tell me. I don’t want to be alone.

I lift my chin and hold tight to my anger. “You lied to me. You said you were having drinks with Grant, but Grant’s out of town. You said you were staying at Jake’s, but you were with Molly.”