“I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to be,” I said. “But I would never allow you to lose your job over me, you know that?” I was careful not to touch her, despite how much I wanted to. I didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable, but more than that, I didn’t want to have to suffer her rejection again.
“It’s not up to you.” She glanced at her feet. “It’s Captain Moss’s decision. And in any case, gossip runs riot in this industry. An affair between a crew member and a charter guest would get out and I’d never find another position.” She paused. “It’s not that I don’t . . . There’s just too much at stake.” Her eyes welled with tears. “I feel like I’m being punished. Last night—I should have never. And now my dad and I’m thousands of miles away, with no way to contact them. I’m not going to find out the test results until God knows when. I just wish I could be there.”
“But you can call, every hour if you need to, surely. The captain doesn’t ration the phone, right?”
“We don’t have access to the satellite phone. The calls are too expensive.”
I stood and rounded my desk. “Then use mine. In fact, stay in here today. And you be on the phone the entire time if you need to.” Thoughts of the legal documents she’d brought with her had faded with her desperation. She was driving chaos into my priorities.
She looked up at me. “Really?”
“Of course.” I hated to see her upset and I could easily work in any of the countless other rooms on the yacht.
She shook her head. “I shouldn’t use your phone. I think it would be frowned upon. I mean, I really shouldn’t have told you all this. It’s unprofessional.” She pushed her shoulders back, but her eyes still glistened with tears.
“Avery Walker, I will be offended if you don’t use this phone.” I checked my watch. “I’ll need to use it at three fifteen New York time, once I’ve read these documents. So make the most of it.”
She shook her head.
“Avery, I am a paying guest. I thought guests always got what they wanted?”
She paused and exhaled. “Thank you,” she said, her voice quivering. “You’re a very nice man.” I winced at how formal and awkward that sounded and as if she agreed, she frowned. “And a very good kisser. I just—”
I shook my head and tried to bite back my grin. “Shhh. You don’t have to feel bad. My heart is intact.” I dipped, trying to catch her eye, and she nodded, reaching out to place her palm on my shoulder.
I smoothed my hand across her back. “Sit down. Call your aunt.” I guided her around my desk so she could take a seat in my chair.
“I need to keep busy,” she said. “But I don’t want everyone asking me why I’m upset.”
“So stay here. Tell people you’re helping me with filing if they ask.”
“I can’t believe I’m having a meltdown on a guest.”
My stomach pinched at her referring to me as a guest. “Being away from your family when they’re vulnerable is tough,” I said. “I understand.”
Talking about personal stuff wasn’t something I did often. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d spoken to anyone about anything other than business. I’d talk a little to the women I slept with but only enough to get them into bed and never anything personal. I found that the ultimate seduction technique was to listen. Or at least pretend to.
I leaned on the desk beside her. “I told you that my brother was in the special forces. During his deployments, it was . . .” I swallowed, remembering the time he went missing for three days in Afghanistan. “It was difficult. Not knowing what’s going on is the worst part. But your father’s doctors have ruled out a heart attack—that’s good news. I’m sure you’ll feel better when the test results come back and you know what you’re dealing with.” I swept my thumb under one eye and then the other. “Save your tears until you have more information.” It was what I’d said to my mother when we heard Landon was missing.
In the days Landon had been unaccounted for, anger, not fear, had been my primary emotion. Anger at the armed forces. Anger at his decision to enlist. Anger at my inability to do anything. My mother’s tears had represented a lack of hope, so I’d channeled my fear into anger.
“Do you want me to call the hospital to see if I can speed things up?” I asked.
“No, but thank you. My aunt is a lioness. She’ll be all over those physicians, riding their asses. But I appreciate it.”
I stood and headed out to leave her in peace. “If there’s anything I can do, just say it.”