Too bad it wasn’t really up to me. Even as Artistic Director my powers were limited. I could make recommendations, but what a product was called was ultimately up to marketing. They were the geniuses who had come up with the name for the new line and basically left it up to me to figure out what the hell that meant.
But it would still be up to them to name the individual items. It wasn’t really fair, but something I just had to put up with. Despite any ambitions, Asgard Fine Jewelry was in the business of sales, not art.
The designs reminded me of Ragnar. Particularly the leather bracelets he wore. It looked like the design marked into them was a traditional rendition of Loki, which stood to reason. I tried to put him out my mind, so I could at least try and eat some work done, before going to meet him for lunch.
I hoped it was clear enough. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to sleep with him, I just wasn’t really up to it right then. So, a restaurant it was, neutral ground bereft of any sexual undertones, making it clear I wasn’t available for our usual kind of fun. That didn’t mean I didn’t want to see him though. If anything, having our baby growing inside me made me feel even more connected.
I just needed to be sure that we had a chance at a future together before I told him. It might not be an issue at all if what was happened was just a fling. I wouldn’t find out unless I saw him.
He was dressed surprisingly nicely. Still like himself, but in a way that wouldn’t get him turned away from the door of the Cedar Lounge. His bracelets weren’t gone but hidden under a black button up shirt. He still wore a band shirt underneath, though, the collar of which I could see just peeking from the gap at the top. Rather than his usual chucks, he wore old but polished boots, that could easily pass for dress shoes when worn with long pants.
“I’ve already ordered, I hope that’s okay.”
“Yes, fine.”
The spark was definitely there. Had he asked me to marry him in that moment, I would have said yes, without a second thought. Not just because of his clothes, though I did appreciate the gesture, but Jonna was right. It didn’t matter what other people thought. I didn’t hide her or her interests, so there was no reason to be embarrassed by Ragnar and his lifestyle.
It took all kinds to make a world. And a proposal would put my mind at rest about our future. We could be together, with our baby and have a happy little family.
“I have something to tell you.”
I could tell from his tone the news was not good. I took a breath and prepared myself for the worst. It was a mistake to get my hopes up. Something usually went wrong.
“I’m going away for a while. Not back to Norway, at least not for a while, we’ll be back, there are only about nine other countries to visit first.”
“We?”
“The band. Seth is getting ready to launch the album and has somehow managed to book us on a tour.”
“That was fast.”
“The recording was done in five days Not usual but possible, particularly when a band is as practiced as we are. We just went in and did it live, and he recorded us. It was maybe three takes per track. He’s already taking pre-orders and wants to take copies with us to sell at the merch table on tour, particularly in the countries it could be difficult to get shipping to. The importation fees can be a killer.”
“I know it. That sounds like Seth, always thinking of the fans.”
“That’ what I thought too.”
“So, how long will you be gone?”
“About six months.”
The tears were pushing up against the dam, but I fought bravely to hold back the flood. It was good news in a way. At least I knew. It wasn’t he conclusion I wanted, but at least one had been reached. There was no way in hell I was going to burden him with the news of our child. He had other responsibilities, to his bandmates, to their fans, to all the people who counted on him. It wouldn’t be easy, but I had to let him go. He had his own life to live, and it didn’t look like it could include me.
“We’re playing here tonight. The last show before the tour starts, we’re getting the plane to Iceland tomorrow. The it is across most of Europe, and then down to New Zealand and Australia, before heading back into Europe for Norway. I want to see you again before we go.”
“Are you asking me to the show?”
“Inviting, guest list and everything. It’s already getting pretty hard to get tickets. After the album and the tour, it will probably only get more difficult.”