The mere fact I'd killed his like before - but that wasn't exactly something I could admit.
He glanced up at the floor indicator. "We have ten seconds left. I want you to meet me near the front of the zoo in half an hour. If you don't, I shall report your activities and you will be killed." His dark gaze met mine. "Deal?"
"I have a choice?"
He merely smiled and stepped away as the elevator stopped and the doors slid open. I walked out and headed back to my room. Berna and Nerida weren't in their beds, which given the ratio of men to women in the arena didn't entirely surprise me. And some men did prefer their bedmates at least willing rather than simply paid vessels of satisfaction. Though I guess that's exactly what those of us who were here as fighters were anyway - we just had a little more choice in the matter.
I hesitated near the foot of my bed, briefly consumed by the ache of tiredness. I wanted to sleep, to just lay down and forget Merle and Starr and every other weirdo in this godforsaken place. But sleep wasn't an option just yet, because I had a lizard to meet, a brother to find, and an ache to ease. I grabbed my toiletries bag and headed for the shower. A good scrub washed the smell and feel of Merle from my skin, but did nothing for the trepidation curling through my gut. I needed to talk to someone now, not later, and the only choice I had was Jack.
I headed outside, ensured no one was within listening distance, then lightly pressed the com-link. "Hey, boss, you awake?"
"About time you reported in," he growled. "I was starting to worry."
Yeah, he was so worried he'd sent in the rescue troops. Not. "You're the one who insisted on sending in the amateur. Don't whine at me if I don't do things the way you want them done."
He grunted. What that meant was anyone's guess. "What's happening?"
I headed up the small path that snaked around the building and onto the zoo. "Several things. Some good, some bad."
He sighed. "Tell me."
"Well, I've rubbed groins with Merle and made him a happy, happy man. And I've discovered that, with a little effort, I can slip through his thoughts, though I didn't dare go too deep tonight."
"Glad caution won out for a change." He paused. "So there weren't psi-deadeners in the lower areas?"
I hesitated, but the fact was, sooner or later he was going to have to know about my apparent ability to override the force of the deadeners. It might as well be sooner. And at least he couldn't rip me into the Directorate for more tests. "There are. My talents are apparently slipping under them."
"We noted a slight increase last time we tested, but it wouldn't have been powerful enough to slide past deadeners."
"Would it have been powerful enough to breach Quinn's defenses?"
He didn't say anything for a moment, then, "When did that happen?"
"Yesterday. I did catch him by surprise, mind."
"It shouldn't have mattered." Again the silence stretched a little, and if I didn't know better, I would have thought he was worried. "It's six months since you were given the ARC1-23. This could be the first sign that it is changing you."
"Or it could simply mean that Dia is right, and my talents are maturing thanks to the fact I'm finally menstruating." There was nothing like clinging to a forlorn hope until the very last moment, but what other choice did I have? I wanted to be normal - wanted to have a normal life. Well, as normal as a half-werewolf, half-vampire guardian could, anyway. I didn't want to be some freak monitored by the labs for every little outlandish change the drugs made. "Wolves do mature slower than humans. And remember, neither Rhoan and I have any idea what our father was, besides a vampire. He could have been a hawk-shifter with massive psi-talents before his undeath, for all we know."
"There were indications of latent talents in all previous tests, I've told you that. But latent doesn't always mean those talents will develop."
"Maybe it's a result of the training you've been giving me."
"Two weeks ago you couldn't have broken through my full shields, let alone Quinn's. If that's what you did, then this is more than maturing talent. You'll have to come in for full tests once this mission is over."
I closed my eyes, blew out a breath. It did nothing to ease the deep rush of hatred and anger. The end of my life as I knew it was one step closer, and I had Starr and his fucking desire to not only build the perfect killing machine but take over the world - or at least the Melbourne section of it - to thank for it. If he'd been near me right then, I would have killed the bastard and been done with it, no matter what the consequences.
"I never wanted to be a guardian, Jack. You know that."
"There's only two places that can give you the sort of help you need to control the power you seem to be getting - us, or the military."
"I don't want anything to do with the military."
"Then my option is the lesser of two evils."
Which wasn't really saying much.
"What else happened?" he said.