The Darkest Kiss (Riley Jenson Guardian 6)

"I learned that particular lesson the hard way. And the months we have been apart were - " He hesitated, and looked at me. In the ebony depths was an echo of the bleak loneliness I'd seen earlier. "Hard."

"It didn't have to be that way, you know."

He gave me a lopsided smile that had my heart doing odd little flip-flops. "I know. But as you've noted on a number of occasions, I am a very old vampire who likes to get his way."

"Trying to change the very essence of what I am was way out of line."

"I know, and I have had more than enough time alone to regret it, believe me." He shrugged one shoulder. "I did what I thought was best for us. I wanted a chance, Riley, and you didn't seem to be giving me one."

"I was giving you as many chances as Kellen. I saw him no more than you. You were the one playing games. You were the one who kept on pushing and pushing and pushing."

"And you were the one who refused to consider that a soul mate might be anything other than a werewolf," he snapped back, the slightest touch of anger in his voice.

There was nothing I could say to that, because the accusation was true. Finding my wolf soul mate was a dream I'd lived for for as long as I could remember, and it wasn't one that I could give up easily - even now, when much of that dream had already been shattered to dust and blown away by fate.

He sighed, and it was a sound of frustration. "I can't let it end here, Riley. There's just too much that's good between us."

I picked up my coffee, cradling it between my hands and letting it warm my fingers. "Do you remember Dia?"

He frowned. "The clone? The one whose baby we rescued?"

"Yes. She once asked me a very interesting question."

A dark eyebrow arched. "And what might that have been?"

I took a sip of coffee, then said, "She once asked if a being with two souls can have just the one soul mate."

Understanding, and perhaps just the slightest hint of joy, flitted through the ebony depths. "Did you ever come up with an answer?"

"No." I gave him a lopsided smile. "And given the shit fate has been throwing my way of late, I'm not entirely sure I'll ever uncover the answer. But the point she was trying to make is the same one you've been making - I'm not just a wolf. I'm part vampire, as well. It's entirely possible that the two halves of my soul have different expectations and different needs."

"Entirely possible," he agreed, his voice solemn but a delicious mix of desire and relief burning in his dark eyes. "And any other - shall we say, less cultured - vampire would be tempted to say 'I told you so' here."

I laughed and threw a strawberry at him. He ducked out of its way, and the strawberry hit the lamp on the bedside table beside him and bounced off into the middle of the room.

I uncrossed my feet and rose to retrieve it. There was no point in wasting a perfectly edible strawberry, after all. "I still believe I have a wolf soul mate out there somewhere, Quinn, so it won't ever be just you and me."

"But will you continue to be the free and easy wolf that I first met months and months ago?"

I padded across the carpet, my toes getting lost in the thick fibers. "Hey, you fell for that werewolf, so she can't have been too bad."

"She wasn't. And she still isn't. But I've always desired more than being just another number on speed dial."

I snorted softly. "You were never on speed dial."

"Well, that makes the situation even worse." His voice was dry, but amusement lingered near his lips. "As I keep saying, what we have deserves more than that."

I bit into the strawberry, catching the bits of chocolate that flaked off with my free hand. "I think we need to go back to the very beginning and start again. I think we need to date, and learn to be friends, before we decide on anything else."

"And forgo sex? After the sex we just had? Are you crazy?"

I laughed. "I am not suggesting we forgo sex. I'm just suggesting we include all the other regular relationship stuff, as well. We've never really had that, you know."

He sobered. "And a good part of that was my fault."

"Yep," I agreed, then laughingly ducked the pillow he threw at me. "Hey, at least I never said it was all your fault. I've come that far."

"I suppose I should be grateful for small mercies."