"Bitch," he muttered, his eyes still glazed and furious, his body bucking like a bronco.
"Enough," I yelled, and pressed the leg a little harder against his neck. He was wheezing, struggling to breathe, but I didn't let up the pressure. I couldn't when he was in this frame of mind. He wasn't even seeing me. He wasn't seeing anyone or anything except Liander lying bloody and hurt somewhere.
"Rhoan, look at me. This is stupid - we need to find Liander, not fight."
He still wasn't listening, too consumed by the grief wrapping around him. He continued to struggle, forcing me to grip tighter with my legs to even stay on top of him.
Blood dripped from my nose, splattering across his face and lips. He licked automatically, and suddenly his movements stopped.
"You're bleeding," he said, as the coldness began to seep from his eyes.
"Well, I fucking wonder why?" I swiped at my nose with an arm. "Are you going to hit me again? Or are you finally over your little hissy fit and ready to do something useful?"
"I didn't mean - " He stopped. We both knew he did mean. "I'm sorry."
"So you fucking should be." I tossed the chair leg aside and got up. "You might want to shift shape. I think I did some damage to your leg."
"Yeah," he said, wincing as he tried to move it. He shifted shape, lying there in wolf form for several seconds before changing back to human form. He climbed to his feet and grimaced. "Better, but not great."
I couldn't feel sorry for him. I might understand why he'd lashed out, but that didn't mean he was getting any sympathy. Especially when my jaw was aching and my nose was throbbing.
"First things first," I said. "We need to find the old school photo Liander was going to give me, and check all the names on it. We need to know if it's just Liander he's snatched, or whether he's taken them all."
"That's downstairs on the coffee table." He spun and headed for the stairs. The anger still bubbled in him, thick and strong, but at least it now had direction. "He was showing me before we had our argument."
I followed him down. "What the hell were you arguing about this time?"
"He wanted to move in with us."
"So?"
He looked over his shoulder. "You knew?"
"He asked for my permission first." I raised a hand to my jaw, massaging it lightly. It hurt to talk, but it didn't feel like anything was broken. Maybe he'd pulled his punch at the last moment. "Don't tell me that's what you argued about."
"I don't know if I'm ready for that yet."
"You're never ready for anything he wants, Rhoan." I hesitated, then added harshly, "And now you may very well not have to worry about it ever again."
He stopped and swung around violently. "That's unfair - "
"No, what you're doing to him is unfair. He's your soul mate, Rhoan. Dammit, why won't you just start treating him like it?"
"Because of this! Because of things like this!"
I looked at him incredulously. "Why has him being kidnapped got anything to do with your relationship?"
"It's what could happen to him. I'm a guardian - "
"That's just a fucking excuse, Rhoan, and you know it."
"How can you say that when you lost Kellen for the very same reason?"
"Kellen left because he didn't want to sit at home wondering if each night was going to be the night I didn't come home. Liander's accepted that possibility and is willing to live with it."
"But I'm not. If I commit to him, if we do the moon ceremony, and then something happens to me, he dies. And I don't want that. I couldn't live with that."
"Death isn't always the end result of the moon bond." Although I had no proof of that. Ben might have survived the death of his soul mate, but they hadn't sworn their love to the moon. Maybe that was the difference.