I closed my eyes briefly, took a deep breath, then stepped forward.
It was then that Azriel appeared and blocked my path to the reaper.
What on earth are you doing? The words seemed to echo across the golden light, and an odd hush fell around us.
I’m sorry, Risa, but this cannot happen.
It is my time—
Yes, it is, but that does not mean I can let you go.
It is better for everyone—
Not everyone, he said and with such ferocity the very world around us quivered under its force. Definitely not everyone.
Then he reached out, grabbed my arm, and yanked me forward.
Not into death.
Into life.
I have no idea how long it took me to wake. I know I fought it for a very long time, desperate to snatch back what had been taken. Desperate to find that reaper again and move on, to be with my mother and far away from the pain and the hurt and the guilt and the never-ending expectations of others.
But that was an option that was not mine to take. Not now.
When I finally did open my eyes, it was to discover I wasn’t alone. I guess that was no surprise. I did have people who cared for me, even if a tiny part of me actually resented that fact right now. If I’d moved on, as fate had destined me to, then I would not once again be responsible for their safety.
You are not responsible for our safety, Risa. We are more than capable of taking care of ourselves.
The voice wasn’t Azriel’s. It was Aunt Riley’s.
I turned my head and looked at her. She was standing at the end of my hospital bed, her arms crossed and her expression severe. “You, my girl, will stop wishing yourself dead and start celebrating the fact you were given a second chance.”
“I wasn’t given anything,” I retorted. “It was forced onto me.”
“Running away, however you intended to do it, is never the answer—trust me on that.”
“It would have been a hell of a lot easier than remaining here and being forced—”
I cut the words off before I could reveal a little too much, and she narrowed her eyes. “Being forced to do what?”
“The bidding of the fucking Raziq and my father and god knows who else. Ilianna was kidnapped because of me. Tao fights for control of his own body because of me. My mother is dead because of me—”
She sucked in her breath. “How did Dia get into this?”
Tears stung my eyes, and all that anger suddenly just washed away. “It was Lucian who killed her.”
“And he’s dead?”
“Well and truly.”
“Good.” She moved up the side of the bed, then sat and gathered my hand in hers. “I know it feels right now that death would be the easier option, but trust me, it isn’t.”
“But the keys—”
“We can sort out the key problem together,” she said. “But you cannot allow yourself to fall into the trap of death. There are those in this world who can recall spirits and force them to do their bidding. What makes you think they will not do that to you?”
“Because they need me in flesh form to find—”