The Return of the Rebel
Page 57
“I sent some of your sketches to a friend of a friend. And I included a picture of you in that yellow outfit you had on at the casino.”
“You didn’t?” She looked at him as though she was waiting for him to say he was joking.
“Cleo, I’m serious. I sent your stuff to an industry professional. He is interested in meeting with you.”
“Why didn’t you ask me first?”
“I thought about it, but I didn’t know how it’d work out. I mean, I’m no judge of fashion. I just know what I like—”
“So if this expert didn’t like what they saw, you didn’t want to hurt me.”
He nodded, relieved that she understood his motive. “Exactly. I have his name and number written down.” Jax reached into his pocket and withdrew the slip of paper. “He’s expecting your call.”
“I should be upset with you for going behind my back, but I’m grateful. Thank you. You’re the first person since my grandmother to believe I could make my dreams come true without just settling for what is expected of me.”
He reached out for her hand and took it in his own. “You can do whatever you set your mind to. And I’m going to enjoy watching you succeed.”
She leaned over and hugged him. His heart pounded beneath her cheek. What had he ever done to be lucky enough to have someone so special in his life?
Cleo lifted her head and looked at him. “But next time you have a brilliant idea, talk to me first. Agreed?”
He expelled a pent-up breath. “Agreed.”
“Now let’s get inside. Charlie is anxious to get out of this carrier.”
Jax dashed out the door and strode around the front of the vehicle to assist her. “Would you mind taking Charlie while I grab my crutches? We can come back out later for the rest of our stuff. Not that there’s a lot of it.”
He did as she asked and escorted her up the walk. Cleo smiled and greeted the other people coming and going. This place was crawling with young people, from college students to young mothers with strollers. He could imagine Cleo fitting in well here.
“I’ve never had a houseguest before.” Cleo sent him a hesitant glance. “You’ll be my first. I wish I’d known you were staying. I’d have cleaned up some.”
Staying? Here? With her? Like an honest-to-goodness couple? The reality of the situation was setting in and all of the uncertainties in the back of his mind came rushing forth—from the potential for his cancer to return to her mother’s dislike of him. Jax shoved the doubts away. After all, this was what he wanted—Cleo in his life.
/> “I’m sure you don’t have to worry.” He sent her a reassuring smile even though he was feeling anything but assured. “Remember I was already here and the place looked great.”
Before they could say much else, Robyn exited her apartment. She was pushing a pink baby stroller in their direction.
“Oh, look! Robyn has her daughter all dressed up in an outfit I made her.” Cleo picked up her pace on the crutches.
“Welcome home.” The young woman’s face lit up with a broad smile. “Stephie is wide-awake and anxious for Auntie Cleo to visit with her.”
Cleo stopped and leaned over the stroller. “Hey, cutie, aren’t you adorable.”
Jax had never seen Cleo with a baby. Her whole demeanor changed. She almost glowed as she oohed and ahhed over the child. What was it about babies that could affect women of all ages so deeply?
Jax stood back as the women went on and on about the baby. He tried his best to act as if nothing was bothering him, but inside their words were shattering the dreams he’d had about his future—a future with Cleo. With each laugh and smile, his hopes were splintering into shards that cut deep.
What made him think Cleo would fit into his predetermined world?
She was still so young and full of possibilities. His life choices had been drastically narrowed when he’d received his cancer diagnosis. Having a family of his own was not an option for him.
Aside from the question of the lifesaving treatments causing fertility issues, he wouldn’t subject his child to the uncertainty of his cancer making a recurrence. He knew the agony of being a child and losing a parent. He didn’t want to pass on that unhappy legacy.
Cleo had him thinking about all sorts of things he’d never thought about before. Like moving to Las Vegas instead of Hope Springs. He’d let himself get caught up in the moment. First the doctor called with the news that his test results were good and then he’d given in to his desires. It’d been like the fall of dominoes—one thing leading to another. And now Cleo was expecting him to make her happy and as much as he wanted to do just that, he couldn’t.
The truth of the matter was he lived a life of uncertainty. It was bad enough that he had to live every day with a big question mark over his head. It wasn’t fair to ask Cleo to give up her chance to be a mother to live with a man who could become sick again.
The best thing he could do for Cleo was walk away. Forget his dreams of making a future with her. He’d never felt so awful about a decision as he did now. How was he supposed to walk away from the woman whose smile could light up his whole world? He couldn’t even imagine his life without her in it. But it wasn’t as if he had a choice. He had to do what was best for her.