Who Breaks First (Clearwater University)

She can’t. I’m bound to her. If it was possible to sever this tie, I would’ve done it a long time ago.

“You know,” I grab her wrists, stopping her futile attempt to shove me off balance. “Maybe you’re only throwing yourself at that Peter guy because there’s so much frustration in your body. You gotta take it out on another guy.”

“I’m not throwing myself at him,” she bites out.

“Ha!” I lower my head to meet her gaze, bringing us practically nose to nose. “You’ve been dragging that guy around with you because you’re trying to make all three of us pissed.”

Her gaze shifts sideways. “That’s not true.”

“Don’t look away from me,” I demand, moving my head and tugging on her wrists so I stay right in her eye line.

“You’re being such a shit, West!” she snaps.

Her words stoke the anger inside me, and I keep my hold on her wrists. My hands are locked around her thin, dainty little wrists, keeping her from escaping, but the grip isn’t tight. As insane as she makes me, deep down, I have no real desire to hurt Emma. In fact, sometimes, I even fucking fear that I love her.

“You don’t know how big of a shit I can be,” I finally say with a cruel smile. “Answer my question. Are you trying to make us jealous? Do you still want us?”

Her body goes stiff.

I don’t think she’ll answer. I expect her to try to break my hold on her again, to curse me out or try to headbutt me or knee me in the groin. I wouldn’t put it past her—this beautiful girl is fierce as fuck.

But she does.

And as she speaks, tears form in Emma’s eyes.

“West, I don’t know how to talk about any of this,” she says, her voice low and thick. “What happened between you and me was… crazy and intense. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but I—I think about it all the time. And what happened between me and Trent was insane too.” Fire flashes in her eyes, and she yanks against my grip. “Goddamn you, why are you all like this? Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

“Why can’t we leave you alone?” My eyes narrow. “You came back here, Emma. No one made you do that.”

Her lip curls in a snarl, and when she pulls again, I finally release her wrist. She doesn’t run, and she doesn’t shove me again. But she steps toward me, rising up to her full height as if she can intimidate me.

“No. No one made me. But I was invited here. Given a scholarship. And that could change my entire future. So I’m not leaving, West. No matter how much you all want me to. And I’m not trying to make you jealous!” she spits out.

“No? Then why are you dating a guy you have no interest in?”

“I’m not dating him!” she screams, tears welling in her eyes. “And you know why I went out with him in the first place? Because I just wanted to see what it would be like to be with a guy who wouldn’t break my heart!”

My body goes still. Her eyes are still flashing, and I don’t think she has it in her to lie to me right now. She’s too fucking pissed off.

“Emma,” I ask softly. “Why did you turn me down in high school?”

She blinks, a single tear sliding down her cheek, but a glare still contorting her features.

“I had feelings for all three of you in high school, you asshole. Then all three of you came to me, asking me out—asking me to choose you. What the hell was I supposed to do? I was falling in love with all three of you, in different ways. Was I supposed to pick one? Break two hearts to make one happy? I wouldn’t even be happy with that. I didn’t want to ruin what we had, the four of us. All four of us.”

Time seems to slow down. People are still walking across campus, some slowing in their tracks to watch our very public altercation. But I don’t give a fuck about that.

What Emma said rings true. I never knew for sure, but I always suspected it was something like that… then, of course, it stopped mattering anyway when she betrayed Trent.

“So, you turned all three of us down?” I ask slowly.

“Yeah. I did.”

Emma tears her gaze away from mine, looking down. But that’s not right. I need to see her eyes. I put my hand under her chin and tilt her face up toward mine.

“I would have treated you best, Emma,” I say, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that’s the truth.

For a split second, tenderness and longing flash in her eyes. She’s gorgeous like this. She looked this way in the closet that day after she came, although I know she tried to hide it from me. She looks small and vulnerable and so fucking sweet, and I want so badly to kiss her—