“Who wasn’t?” Nicole laughed. “When I was eleven, I had their posters all over my room.”
“Me, too!” Tiara said, smiling. “Who was your favorite?”
“Mmm, maybe Joey”
Petra let out a loud “Ha!”
“What’s wrong with Joey?”
“Nothing, if you like boys who tan like it’s an Olympic sport.”
“He was pretty orangey,” Nicole agreed. “J. T. Woodland was the best, anyway. He was so cute, with those big eyes and those curls. He was the most talented one, I think. I wonder why they kicked him out?”
“I’ll bet it was drugs.” Tiara batted away a dragonfly.
“It wasn’t drugs,” Petra said.
“How can you be sure?” Tiara asked.
“He just didn’t seem like the drugs type to me.”
“Boy band loyalty.” Nicole nodded. “I feel you.”
“Can we keep going please?” Shanti called back.
The girls picked up their pace. On the other side of the river, orange-and-pink birds waded on stalklike legs. Shafts of sun broke through the heavy trees. They lit patches of ground like the reflections from some tropical disco ball.
“What was your favorite song of theirs?” Tiara asked.
“ ‘Let Me Shave Your Legs Tonight, Girl,’” Petra blurted out.
“Ohmigosh, I LOVE that one!” Tiara said, clapping. “How about ‘I Only Want to Be with You’ or ‘I Just Need to Be Yours’ or ‘You, You, You’?”
Nicole chimed in. “‘I Gave Up My Hobbies So I Could Spend More Time with You.’ ‘I Love You Like a Stalker!’ Or — ooh, I know: ‘Safe Tween Crush’?”
“That one is so awesome!” Tiara began to sing. “Wanna rock you, girl, with a butterfly tunic. / No, I’m not g*y, I’m just your emo eunuch. / Gonna smile real shy, won’t cop a feel, / ’cause I’m your virgin crush, your supersafe deal. / Let those other guys keep sexing. / You and me, we be texting / ’bout unicorns and rainbows and our perfect love. / Girl, we fit together like a hand in a glove. / Now I don’t mean that nasty, tell your mom don’t get mad. /I even wrote ‘You’re awesome’ on your maxi pads.” Tiara sighed. “My mom let me use that song for my Christian pole dancing routine.”
Petra sputtered. “Christian pole dancing?”
“Yeah. It was my talent for a while. I was a virgin bride on her wedding day — kinda like in that TiffanyJeanTiffany video? I wore this mini wedding dress and these white stockings with garters and some pretty silver handcuffs. It was a real fun routine.” She sighed. “But once I turned ten, my mom said I needed something new.”
“That is total crazytown,” Petra said.
“I know! I think I could have done it till I was at least twelve.”
Petra rolled her eyes and sang, “Let me shave your legs tonight, girl. Let me show you how it feels when your man …”
“Your man!” the girls sang.
“Can’t stand …”
“Can’t stand!”
“The stub-ble inside your heart, oh!”
Annoyed, Shanti walked a good ten paces ahead of the others. She liked being in the lead, and as she walked, she practiced.
“Hello,” she said, practicing her intonation, because tone was everything. “I am Shanti Singh, Miss California, land of opportunity! I am a junior at Valley High School, where I currently maintain a 4.0 CPA. My parents immigrated to America just before I was born, and I am so grateful to this country for giving me so many great opportunities. I hope to show my gratitude one day by becoming the first Indian-American president. And I also hope to work with children,” she added hastily. “And, um, animals.”