Damsel Under Stress (Enchanted, Inc. 3)

“I work with Owen,” I explained. “I couldn’t get home for Christmas, so they invited me to join them.”

He nodded, and the smile he gave me echoed the disbelief I’d seen from everyone I’d told that story. He knew I must be more than a co-worker, and I was being investigated by the folks. “It’s nice to see him have friends,” he said, putting a funny little emphasis on the word “friends.” “He was always a quiet one.” He glanced over his shoulder toward the person we were talking about, then blinked. I couldn’t blame him. I was pretty sure I’d blinked, too, when I followed his gaze.

The older people and creatures who’d been fussing over Owen were gone, and he was instead surrounded by a gaggle of young women who looked like they’d stumbled onto a rock star. He was backing slowly away from them, but if he didn’t escape soon, they were likely to tear the clothes off him. The only thing keeping him relatively safe was the fact that the mothers of all the young women were also involved, running interference to keep the others out of the way of their daughters. Handbags flew with a fury I’d only seen before at a designer sample sale Gemma had once dragged me to.

The mob moved in my general direction, possibly because Owen instinctively headed toward me. I wasn’t sure how I could help. It didn’t look like that bunch was going to be fended off by me stepping up and declaring that I was his girlfriend. That would probably only make things uglier.

“Ladies, ladies,” the minister urged, “this isn’t the time or place.” A frosted snowman cookie then splatted against his festive purple stole. I couldn’t believe it. All these WASPy magical types were starting a food fight in the church hall. I hurried to get on the other side of the food table, out of the range of fire, as the women pelted each other with food. Owen wisely took advantage of the opportunity to duck under one of the tables. If I wasn’t mistaken, he’d also gone invisible at the same time. I was sure I felt the tingle of magic in use.

But it was more magic than I’d expect for a simple invisibility spell. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and I had shivers going down my spine. That meant a lot of magic was flying around the room. I looked to see if I could find James and Gloria. James was standing in a corner, chatting with some of the other older men while drinking coffee, seemingly oblivious to the chaos—or else pointedly ignoring it. Gloria did not look amused. She was trying to drag one of the mothers away from the melee. I was impressed with the way she managed to avoid being hit by any of the flying cupcakes or cookies.

ervice ended with an announcement that there would be a reception in the church hall. “We’ll make a token appearance, but we won’t stay long,” Gloria whispered to us as we gathered our coats and followed the crowd out of the sanctuary. The hall was in a more modern building that still wasn’t very new, and it had fake walnut paneling on the walls and yellowed linoleum on the floor. It looked a lot like most church halls I’d seen. A couple of folding tables with red and green paper tablecloths on them stood down one side of the room. One held trays of Christmas cookies and cupcakes while another held a punch bowl, a tea service, and a coffee urn. As we hung our coats on pegs near the doorway, Gloria hissed, “Now, remember, just greet people, have a cookie, and then we’ll go home. Don’t spoil your dinner.”

“She hates these things, but she feels obligated,” Owen confided to me as soon as Gloria had pasted a smile on her face and moved ahead to make a circuit of the room. “She thinks social chitchat is a waste of time.”

“I kind of have to agree with her there,” I said, but before I could add anything, we were surrounded.

“Look at you, all grown up,” said a gnome who stood craning his neck to look up at Owen. “I remember when you only came up to my shoulder.”

The other locals then chimed in about how good it was to have Owen back for a visit. He blushed bashfully, but he didn’t seem too taken aback. Apparently these were all people he knew and was comfortable with. I caught his eye and mimed drinking a cup of coffee, and he responded with a nod and a smile before returning to his conversation.

I made my way over to the refreshment table, where the cookies sat practically untouched. Back home, that would have been the ultimate insult to the cooks who’d made them, so I took a couple, just to be polite, of course. “And I’d thought we might not have enough,” a voice behind me said. I turned to see the minister, still in the black robe he’d worn for the service. “You’re a friend of the Eatons?” he asked.

“I work with Owen,” I explained. “I couldn’t get home for Christmas, so they invited me to join them.”

He nodded, and the smile he gave me echoed the disbelief I’d seen from everyone I’d told that story. He knew I must be more than a co-worker, and I was being investigated by the folks. “It’s nice to see him have friends,” he said, putting a funny little emphasis on the word “friends.” “He was always a quiet one.” He glanced over his shoulder toward the person we were talking about, then blinked. I couldn’t blame him. I was pretty sure I’d blinked, too, when I followed his gaze.

The older people and creatures who’d been fussing over Owen were gone, and he was instead surrounded by a gaggle of young women who looked like they’d stumbled onto a rock star. He was backing slowly away from them, but if he didn’t escape soon, they were likely to tear the clothes off him. The only thing keeping him relatively safe was the fact that the mothers of all the young women were also involved, running interference to keep the others out of the way of their daughters. Handbags flew with a fury I’d only seen before at a designer sample sale Gemma had once dragged me to.

The mob moved in my general direction, possibly because Owen instinctively headed toward me. I wasn’t sure how I could help. It didn’t look like that bunch was going to be fended off by me stepping up and declaring that I was his girlfriend. That would probably only make things uglier.

“Ladies, ladies,” the minister urged, “this isn’t the time or place.” A frosted snowman cookie then splatted against his festive purple stole. I couldn’t believe it. All these WASPy magical types were starting a food fight in the church hall. I hurried to get on the other side of the food table, out of the range of fire, as the women pelted each other with food. Owen wisely took advantage of the opportunity to duck under one of the tables. If I wasn’t mistaken, he’d also gone invisible at the same time. I was sure I felt the tingle of magic in use.

But it was more magic than I’d expect for a simple invisibility spell. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and I had shivers going down my spine. That meant a lot of magic was flying around the room. I looked to see if I could find James and Gloria. James was standing in a corner, chatting with some of the other older men while drinking coffee, seemingly oblivious to the chaos—or else pointedly ignoring it. Gloria did not look amused. She was trying to drag one of the mothers away from the melee. I was impressed with the way she managed to avoid being hit by any of the flying cupcakes or cookies.

The scene was right out of a slapstick comedy. I wouldn’t have been surprised if the Keystone Kops had shown up to stop the riot. And the Baptists used to accuse the Methodists back home of being wild, I thought with a grin. At least we’d never had a food fight in the fellowship hall. Well, not when it was anyone other than the kids involved. I decided that James had the right idea, so I moved to the far side of the room, well away from the fracas and near enough to the door that I could escape if I needed to.

Then while I was still fighting back giggles, the sense of magic intensified and someone grabbed me from behind.

Nine

At first I thought it was Owen, having made it safely out from under the table and ready to make his escape with me. I went willingly as he pulled me through the door to the parking lot outside. But then he didn’t release me, and I realized that something was wrong. I kicked my captor in the shin and pulled away.

It was my old friend Mr. Bones, one of Idris’s cronies, and now I was absolutely certain that it was the same skeleton guy I’d seen in that office. He had a bunch of his goons lined up, surrounding me.

He didn’t have to tell me that screaming would do no good. The noise from the riot inside spilled into the parking lot. One more female scream wouldn’t stand out in all that. Instead, I did what I did best. I bent down and scooped up a handful of slushy snow, packed it into a ball, and threw it. I needed to come up with a new trick for when I got into a tough spot, but I had a good arm and good aim, so I figured I might as well stick with what I knew for the time being. Maybe I’d sign up for a karate class when things settled down some at work.

The snowball hit Mr. Bones square in the face and some of the slush trickled into his eye socket, which couldn’t have felt good. While he was still reacting, I made another snowball and threw it in the general direction of the other goons. I’d been in all of two snowball fights in my life, on the very rare occasions when we’d had enough snow to make snowballs back home in Texas, so I didn’t have a lot of practice with this. The goons were closing in, and it was harder and harder to keep them at bay with snowballs.

Something came out of the sky, and I instinctively ducked. It had been my experience that some truly scary things could come at you from out of the sky. This time, though, it looked like the air force was friendly. Two unfamiliar gargoyles swooped around, keeping themselves between the goons and me. “You’d better make a run for it, miss,” one of them shouted as it flew past me. “We don’t got a lot in the way of attack magic.”

“Yeah, just staying animated takes a lot out of us,” the other said.

“Bein’ a gargoyle ain’t easy,” the first one said.

“Watch it, you idiot!” the other called out when they almost collided in midair. After the near miss, both of them laughed so hard they almost fell out of the sky.

These gargoyles were keeping the goons from getting to me, but I was still surrounded. I wasn’t sure how long the gargoyles could hold them off. I made another snowball and took aim at the goon that was between me and the door to the church hall. If I could just create a gap in that circle and make a break for it, I was sure I’d be safe inside, surrounded by Owen, Gloria, James, and a whole bunch of presumably friendly magical people. I could even kill two birds with one snowball by creating a distraction to break up the fight inside and rescue Owen from the horde of matchmaking mamas.