“Whoa, hold your horses, kids,” Sam said, holding his hands out with a “stop!” motion. “I didn’t say it was a disaster, and I don’t think you bein’ in town would have made much of a difference. The boss just wants you back ASAP so you can get a read on things and start formulating a disaster-control plan first thing in the morning.”
“So nobody’s dead, bleeding, or in danger?” I asked to clarify things.
“Nothing scary yet, but it’s a doozy, believe me.”
“It’s a couple of hours until the next train, since they’re running on a holiday schedule,” James said, checking his watch. “I suppose you could borrow our car.”
“It’s okay, Pops,” Sam said. “We got it covered. Rolls is on the way.” I had a brief mental image of returning to the city in a chauffeur-driven Rolls-Royce, but Sam’s next statement shattered it. “In fact, I’m almost surprised he didn’t beat me. He doesn’t hold too much to things like speed limits. Come to think of it, even the laws of physics don’t mean much to him.” Apparently this Rolls was a person, not a car. Rats.
By this time, Gloria had joined us in the foyer. “Dinner’s getting cold,” she said. “What’s the matter?”
Owen turned to her. “It’s a situation back in the city. I don’t know much more than that. They sent a car to get us back quickly.”
“You don’t have time to eat?”
“’Fraid not, ma’am,” Sam said. There was a loud screech of tires outside. “That’ll be Rolls now.”
“While you two get packed, I’ll put together some dinner to take with you,” Gloria said. “Now go! You need to hurry.”
Owen and I ran up the stairs. I didn’t have much to pack, so it didn’t take long. When I got back down to the foyer, Owen was already there, getting our coats out of the closet. Gloria came from the direction of the kitchen, carrying a small hamper. She hustled us outside to where a silver Town Car waited in the driveway. On its hood perched two of the oddest gargoyles I’d ever seen—and most gargoyles are pretty odd, so that was really saying something. I recognized them as my guardians from the night before.
“Here are your passengers,” Sam said to the waiting gargoyles. “Treat ’em nice. They’re in tight with the big boss, and the boy there could zap you back to stone on a permanent basis. Katie, Mr. P., I’d like you to meet Rocky and Rollo.”
“Otherwise known as Rock and Roll!” the two gargoyles chorused. They looked like something out of a Saturday-morning cartoon, all popeyed and funny-faced.
The taller one with a long, thin face added, “We met last night at the church, but we haven’t been properly introduced. Oh, and Rocky’s not my real name. It’s just a nickname, on account of I’m made of stone.” He and Rollo nearly fell off the hood of the car, laughing. Rocky coughed, got himself under control, then said, “Get it? Rocky? Stone?” He elbowed the other gargoyle in the ribs, and both of them fell to laughing again.
I turned to ask James if the offer to borrow his car still held, but Sam opened the door to the backseat for us and said, “Well, go on with you. I’ll fly on ahead and let the boss know you’re on the way.”
“Last one there’s a rotten egg,” Rollo said. He was shorter and squatter than his buddy, and instead of having a separate pair of arms, his wings were his arms, with tiny hands at the ends.
With grave misgivings, I climbed into the backseat. Owen gave Arawn one last scratch behind the ears, then slid in next to me. Gloria reached into the car to hand him the hamper. “You can eat on the way. I put together two plates, some dessert, and some extra napkins. I wish you could have stayed longer, but I know duty calls. Katie, it was very nice to meet you. I hope you’ll come again.”
“Thank you for having me. I enjoyed myself.”
“I’ll give you a call when we get back and have things settled,” Owen said. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before stepping back and letting Rocky close the door.
Neither gargoyle was big enough to see over the steering wheel while also reaching the pedals, so I wondered if gargoyles could adjust their size the way fairies could. The way Sam had talked, Rollo was apparently the driver, and he seemed the least likely to be able to see, steer, and hit the accelerator or brake at the same time. I soon learned how they worked it. Rocky clung to the steering wheel with his feet and used his hands to work the turn signals, gear shift, and horn, while Rollo sat on the floorboard and worked the pedals.
I instinctively reached for the seat belt, and Owen did the same. “Good idea, kids,” Rocky said, looking over his shoulder. “Rolls here has got a stone foot.” He nearly fell off the steering wheel from laughing so hard, and muffled laughter echoed up from under the dashboard. “Get it? It’s supposed to be lead, but since Rolls is made of stone, it’s a stone foot. Okay, Rolls, I’ve got her in reverse and nothing seems to be coming, so give her a nudge.”
The car backed out of the driveway. When Rocky had steered the car into the street, he shifted into drive and said, “We’re on the road. Give her some gas.”
If I’d had any second thoughts about maybe waiting for the next train and letting Owen handle the crisis, there wouldn’t have been much I could have done about it. Rollo really did have a stone foot. We all but flew down the neighborhood streets. If I’d tried to get out of the car, I’d have killed myself. I could only imagine what it would be like once we were on the open road.
“Brake!” Rocky yelled as we neared the intersection with the main road. The car screeched to a halt, fishtailing a little. After checking up and down the road, Rocky then called out, “Hit it,” as he spun the steering wheel by shifting his weight. I wasn’t sure the tires were actually in contact with road surface, we were going so fast.
“Aren’t you worried about getting stopped for speeding?” I asked.
The two gargoyles went into hysterics. “Who can stop an invisible car?” Rocky said between bursts of laughter.
“Hey, Rocky,” Rollo’s voice came up from under the dash, “maybe you should let one catch us someday. Wouldn’t it be funny to see how a cop would react to seein’ a car driven by two gargoyles? Wouldn’t it? Huh?”
“It’d be a scream.”
“I wouldn’t suggest it,” Owen said mildly, even as he white-knuckled the edges of the seat. “You know the rules about exposing yourselves to outsiders.”
“We wasn’t talkin’ ’bout exposing ourselves,” Rocky said, sputtering with laughter. “Just lettin’ ’em see we’re gargoyles.” He and Rollo found that highly amusing, providing their own laugh track once more. “Get it? Usually when you say you’re exposing yourself, you’re talking about the naughty bits.”