Obsessed (Whiskey Run 3)

“I know, Sam. Thanks for taking it easy on me this past month. I’m going to start earning my keep. And I’m glad to be back home too.”

He nods, but it’s obvious by the skeptical look in his eyes that he doesn’t fully believe me. Hell, I don’t either. But what choice do I have? I don’t have one. So I’m going to make the best of it starting today.

Sierra

I blow out a breath as I stare out the window of the Whiskey Run Public Library. If I stand in a certain corner, slide halfway behind a bookshelf, and look to the corner of Main Street and Bruce Street, I can see the front door to McCarthy Security. Evan McCarthy is home. I knew as soon as he got here. I was at Red’s eating lunch with Violet when a woman came from the hair salon saying she’d heard that Evan McCarthy was back in town and this time for good. She didn’t have all the details except that he was honorably discharged from the army and was going back to work at his family’s security firm.

Everyone was abuzz, excited that our town hero was home, but all I could do was worry. I knew that Evan had planned on being a lifer. He had no intentions of ever leaving the army, so the fact that he’s home made me more than worried about him. Not that I could let him know. No, I would have to talk to him to do that. And that’s one thing I don’t do. I don’t talk to Evan McCarthy. I may have watched him all growing up, I may have even helped him in English class a time or two. But that’s it. We were exact opposites in high school, and he barely knew I existed.

From that day one month ago, I have spent more time at the front window of the library looking out, just hoping for a glance of Evan McCarthy. He’s laid low since he got back, and the buzz of him being here has started to die down. No one talks about it anymore. Well, no one but me. I’ve never hidden the fact from Violet that I’ve had a crush on Evan since we were in high school together. Violet, who was in school with his older brother and in turn friends with him, has done everything to encourage me, even making me feel in small part there’s a chance. She insists he would be crazy not to give me a chance. But then I’ll leave from our book club meeting where we talk about books and gossip, and reality sets in. I’m the book nerd, the town librarian. I like order and planning. Evan was the star quarterback in high school. He dated the head cheerleader and was always with the in crowd. I assume he hasn’t changed that much since graduating, and so I know I’m way out of my league.

Before I let the thoughts drown me, I remember how far I’ve come. I’ve quit comparing myself to others. I’ve quit being insecure about my weight, and I’ve learned to love the person I am. I’ve accepted that I’m socially awkward and most usually say the wrong thing. I’m me, and that’s all I need to be. But now that Evan’s back, I can sense my old insecurities coming back, and I want to kick myself for it. The stuttering, quiet girl that used to hide her eyes in a book all the time is rearing to come back, and I refuse to go back to the insecure, self-conscious woman that I used to be.

On that note, I gather the books that Violet requested and put them in a bag over my shoulder. I’m looking forward to delivering her books, having a slice of her famous cake, and catching up with one of my closest friends.

I make a point when I walk out of the library not to even glance over at the security firm. No, that’s a dream I need to give up on. I keep my head pointed in the opposite direction with my shoulders squared. I look as if I’m ready to take on the world... now if only I felt like it too.

Red’s Diner is only a block away. When I walk in, Violet is wiping off the counter, and she smiles when she sees me. The closer I get, the more it looks as if something is on her mind, something she’s worried about. One thing I’ve learned about Violet is she’s a very private person. I found out she was married, by accident really, but I’ve never met her husband, and even though I’d never gossip to anyone about my friend, I still wonder how she was able to get married and no one knows about it. So instead of asking her, I lift the bag off my shoulder to show her the books I’d brought. “Hey, Vi! I have those books you wanted.”