The Kiss Quotient (The Kiss Quotient 1)
Page 95
iminal, and I love him.”
Stella had no words for Michael at that point, so she continued to hold him. What did you say when someone hurt like this? All she could do was rest her beating heart next to his and hurt with him.
After a moment and an eternity, Michael pulled away. Wiping at the tears on her cheeks, he said, “I accepted your proposal because I wanted to help you with your issues, and it’s clear we’ve worked through them. You’re ready for a real relationship now. If some bastard doesn’t want you because you’re autistic, he doesn’t deserve you. Do you hear me? You have nothing to be ashamed of.”
The blood drained from her face, and her heart stopped beating. “You know?”
He smiled slightly. “I figured it out after that first night at my mom’s.”
He’d known all this time? Was that good or bad? She didn’t know. “You want to leave?” she heard herself ask.
“It’s time for me to move on, Stella. We’re not giving each other all the things we need.”
She understood at once he meant her, that she wasn’t enough for him. Because of who and what she was, her impairments and eccentricities, her label.
Black hopelessness dragged her down. It had been naïve of her to hope she could seduce him. Her chin quivered, and she bit the inside of her lip to still the motion. “I see.”
He brushed his fingertips across her cheek, tucked tendrils of hair behind her ear. “You need more than sex, and I can’t give you those things.”
She looked down at her shoes. Maybe it had just been sex for him, but for her, as pathetic as it sounded, it had felt like love.
He smoothed warm hands down her cold arms and squeezed her hands. “Thank you for these past months. They were special to me.”
Not special enough.
“Thank you, Michael. For helping me with my anxiety issues.”
“Promise you won’t be hiring more escorts after this.”
“No more escorts. I promise.” There was only one escort she wanted.
“Good girl.” He breathed a kiss into her hair. “I’m going to go now.”
“I can drive you home.” She didn’t want them to part yet.
“I’d prefer to call a cab. I want to clear my things from your place, and it’s better if you’re not there when I do that. Take care, okay?”
“Okay.”
He dug her key fob, phone, and cards from his pockets and handed them to her. “Good-bye, Stella.”
“Good-bye, Michael.”
Statue-still and numb, she watched as he left. Then, she turned around and walked inside. Her preference was to go home, but he wanted to collect his things in peace. All other exit strategies were out, as well. The thought of passing by him in the parking lot or on the road filled her eyes with fresh tears.
Better to return to the dinner. It was the last place she wanted to be right now.
After going to the bathroom and fixing her makeup as well as she knew how, she seated herself at the table.
“Where’s Michael, Stella dear?” her mother asked quietly.
“He left. We just broke up.”
Philip smirked.
Aliza cast Stella a pitying glance from the other side of Michael’s empty chair and placed a hand on Stella’s shoulder. “Men like him need to be free, darling.”
Stella pushed Aliza’s hand off without a word.