I press a kiss to the top of Jaxi’s head.
Slowly, Rosie’s cries fade, and her body stops shaking. She laces a hand across my body and onto my other shoulder. Her breathing evens out.
My chest is tight as I take in the moment—our trio trying to muddle our way through this. Rosie needs us. Jaxi needs Rosie and me too.
I don’t think they understand how much I’m beginning to need them in return. It’s taken me a day to ponder what my brothers said about love because I am who I am. Well, who I was … but now I want more.
Jaxi’s gorgeous and funny and has the best heart. She makes me want to do better, be better. Falling for her was easy. We click. It’s so insanely natural to be with her—like it’s the only way I can see living now.
But the two of them together?
Since they got here, I’ve had a reason to get up in the morning. I want to impress Jaxi with tales from the office. I practice the voices for Rosie’s bedtime stories on my way home from work every day.
I won’t let us fall apart.
Jaxi rustles at my side and sits up. Her eyes are red and swollen. “I’m sorry,” she says.
“For what?”
“For breaking down like that.”
I shake my head. “You are a hell of a lot stronger than I would’ve been in your situation.”
She half smiles.
“Let’s get off this floor and get her to bed,” I say.
Jaxi nods and gets to her feet. She offers me a hand, and I give it to her, even though her pulling me up is a joke.
We face each other. Unspoken words swim around us, dancing in the midst of the walls that were just broken down.
“I’m going to lay her down,” I whisper.
Jaxi leans forward and kisses Rosie’s cheek. “Good night, sweetheart.”
Rosie doesn’t flinch.
I toss Jaxi a wink and head down the hall and into Rosie’s room. I flip on the night-light on the dresser. It casts a muted glow over all of the mermaid decorations that Mom bought for her. It’s perfect.
I pause and take in the sight and realize how amazing my mother really is. She raised five boys, yet she knew exactly what this little girl needed. She didn’t miss a single thing. It was as if Rosie was hers, and she went above and beyond to make her comfortable.
There’s a message in that, I’m sure. It’s Mom’s style. I’m just not quite sure what it is yet.
Mom is getting an extra hug the next time I see her.
Gently, I place Rosie in her bed and cover her up. I find her Glo Worm buried under a stack of books and tuck it in next to her.
“Night,” I whisper as I back out of the room. I close the door softly.
My body is on alert as if there’s more to do. I just don’t know what it is.
I turn around, and my gaze is snatched up by Jaxi. She’s standing in the middle of my bedroom with an unreadable look on her pretty face.
“Hey,” I say, walking across the hall and into my room too. “You okay?”
“Yeah.”
There’s a hesitation in her eyes that sits just behind a partially constructed wall that I’m sure was built to keep me out.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“I just …” She presses her thumb into her elbow. “We are a lot to deal with, aren’t we?”
“That’s subjective.”
She sighs. “Boone, I’m going to be honest with you.”
“I hope you would.”
She forces a swallow. “I want you to know that it takes everything inside me to have the guts to do this.”
A bolt of uncertainty crashes through me. I have no idea where this is going.
I take her hand and lead her to the bed. We sit next to each other on the mattress.
My heart races as I watch her war over what to say.
She lifts her chin and looks me in the eye. The confidence that I was first so attracted to settles on her face. It’s a façade, though, because I know her enough now to see the fear that is bleeding just behind it.
“I like you,” she says.
“I think it’s obvious that I like you too.”
She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.
“I’m trying to balance all of this in a way that is healthy for everyone involved. I respect you and appreciate you so much. But I also …” She looks down, as her cheeks pink. “I also fight my attraction to you every day. And when you touch me and let me cry against you, I feel … I feel something between us that scares the crap out of me.”
I lift her chin with the tip of my finger. “Why do you fight it?”
“Because all of this is a … it’s a lot. And you didn’t ask for any of it.”