Melanie sank to the edge of the leather sofa and dropped her purse to the floor by her feet. Now that she’d told him, she could breathe a little easier . . . though the color still hadn’t fully returned to his face.
The tension coiling in her lessened, now that the secret was out, but only a bit. There were still so many unknowns, like how he’d react once the shock wore off, how he’d treat her, if he even wanted to be part of the life of their child.
With everything still so new, Melanie didn’t want to take what he said at face value. Once reality fully settled in, Tanner could always change his mind, and saying something and doing something were usually not one and the same. She’d found that out firsthand during her marriage.
Tanner came in and stood near the wide picture window overlooking the front yard and tree-lined street. Silence remained heavy between them, making the tension thicker by the second and doing nothing to calm her erratic nerves.
Melanie pushed her cuticles back and stared at each finger, moving from one to the next. She had to be doing something, anything other than wonder what was going through his mind. She wanted to offer some brilliant words that would ease his worry, that would ease her own anxiety. There were none.
The fact was, they’d created a human and right now she had no clue if he even wanted to be part of the baby’s life when he was barely a part of hers.
Neville had only wanted children so he could use them as a publicity ploy. Everything circled back to how he could make himself look better. Having the so-called family life with the smiling wife and properly mannered kids would only boost ratings for a man running for any government office.
Much to his disappointment and rage, she’d never carried his child. He’d never remarried, ins
tead focusing solely on moving toward his goal of the senate seat . . . all alone.
Her life with Neville had scarred her, shaped her in a way that affected each decision she’d made since living twenty-four months and eight days of pure terror. But the marriage had been over for a few years. Still, her experience was never far from her mind.
“We don’t know each other well,” she started, now picking at her pale pink nail polish. Jade would be irritated Melanie was ruining the manicure she’d just given her. “I acted so out of character when we were at the bar. I just . . . I let Livie and Jade talk me into going. I’d had a terrible day. Then Livie ended up leaving with Jax and Jade was dancing with some guy I’d never met. I wanted to ignore consequences and merely go with what I wanted.”
She didn’t need to mention her hours prior to the outing had been filled with fielding calls from her ex’s assistant. His damn assistant. Apparently Neville wanted to meet with her, but Melanie wasn’t about to give in to his crazy. Never again.
He’d left a veiled threat via his assistant, but Melanie had heard nonsense like that since she left him. He knew full well who held the cards now that she didn’t let him control her. With her pack of photos and proof of the abuse, he’d do best to remember who had the bigger balls here.
Neville wasn’t her problem right now . . . or ever again as far as she was concerned. No, Melanie needed to figure out Tanner’s role in her baby’s life. Did he even want a role?
“I just wanted to get out and have a good time,” she went on, still keeping her eyes on her hands. She couldn’t quite look him in the eyes for fear of what she’d see staring back. “Then you flirted with me, asked me to dance, and I thought, why the hell not. I didn’t expect . . . well, everything that happened after.”
Their chemistry had taken over, consuming them. They’d barely spoken a word, their touches and long stares spoke louder than any words could.
Melanie hadn’t bothered fighting the attraction, the pull toward Tanner. She’d wanted to prove that she was in control of her world, of what happened. That was the whole reason she’d left her old life, to stand on her own two feet and call all the shots.
But a fling? One hundred percent not her style. Yet Tanner had sparked something in her from day one . . . something she’d yet to label. So what if she was human? She’d wanted him, and after two years of no sex, plus years of bad sex before, she decided it was well past time to take charge.
Still, why did she have to be pulled toward powerful men? They both worked in a world where they held so much control, both were confident, assertive, and bold. She couldn’t help but compare the two, considering she hadn’t dated, let alone had sex with anyone since her divorce.
But Tanner wasn’t like Neville. Tanner had an ego, he had confidence, but he didn’t use either of those to force his hand and take what he didn’t deserve. He used his power to help others.
From the time she got into town, Melanie had heard enough about the bachelor officer to know he was well-respected and admired. Neville only had the respect of his brainwashed voters, and those people didn’t know the real man behind the expensive suits and flashy smile.
Tanner still hadn’t spoken and the silence became too much. They had to talk about this, or all of the uncertainty would surely drive her insane.
What happened to the guy she’d known for the past several months? What happened to the self-assured, take-charge man from the bar? The fact that he still hadn’t said a word was concerning. She had no idea if he truly believed her or not, but she wished he’d say something . . . anything.
Clearly they were both not the same characters they’d been that night. Life-changing consequences would do that to a person.
“This situation isn’t ideal for me, either,” she added, risking a glance his way.
His dark eyes masked any emotion he might be feeling. “You seem calm.”
Tanner’s intense stare had her nerves swirling even more. Something dark lurked in his eyes, something she couldn’t put her finger on.
“I’m not calm on the inside. I’m barely holding it together. When life constantly throws roadblocks in your path, you have to cope. Plus, I have to remind myself this isn’t the worst thing that’s happened to me. Getting hysterical now won’t change anything and won’t help me figure out what to do next.”
Tanner leaned his shoulder against the wall next to the window frame and hooked a thumb through his belt loop. He stared another second before blowing out a long breath. He raked a hand down his face, the stubble along his jaw scraping against his palm.
“Damn it, I should’ve asked how you were feeling. Are you alright? Physically? You’re healthy to carry a child to term? Have you seen the doctor?”