I have a huge advantage. Meredith and Stefan have been teaching me how to fight, how to use weapons.
Klaus is so much worse than Damon could ever be: when I think back, I can remember so many times that Damon saved innocents instead of killing them - Bonnie, the humans of the Dark Dimension, half our high school. Me. I owe him my life. Time after time, even when he's wavered, he's turned away from the easy darkness and come down on the right side, the side that saved the helpless. I know he's strayed again -
Elena paused. She couldn't bear to think of it: Damon killing again. But she took a deep breath and faced the truth.
- but maybe it is our fault, mine and Stefan's, for not showing him we care. It was just that once I got Stefan back, all I could think of was clutching him to me so tight that he'd never slip away again. Damon needs us, though he'll never admit it, but we'll fight through the darkness that shrouds him. We will save him. If I can just remind the Guardians of all Damon's done for us in the past, they'll see that he isn't evil. They can be rational, even if they are cold and distant.
I used to hate the idea of being a Guardian, of becoming less human. But now I know that it's a gift, a sacred trust to protect the world. As a Guardian, I can stop some of the deaths, some of the suffering. Once I fully come into my Power, I can use it to defeat the right target. I can still be the one to kill Klaus.
"I called Alaric and told him I'd meet him in an hour," Meredith said. "I had to talk to you guys first. " She stirred a spoonful of sugar into her tea with such careful, precise movements that Elena was sure Meredith was keeping a firm control on herself to avoid slipping into hysteria.
It was the same reason, Elena knew, that Meredith had called just the three of them to meet her at the coffeehouse: Elena, Bonnie, and Matt, Meredith's oldest friends, the tight group that had withstood so much together. Meredith loved Alaric and trusted him with all her heart, just as Elena did Stefan, but sometimes you wanted your best friends with you.
"Cristian says he wants to be my family," Meredith said. "He isn't interested in fighting on Klaus's side. But how can I believe him? I asked Zander what he could sense about Cristian, but he wasn't sure. He says that sometimes, if the person has a lot going on emotionally, his Power doesn't work on them. " She glanced at Bonnie sympathetically. "Zander misses you," she said, and Bonnie stared down at her lap.
"I know," she said softly. "But I can't be the person he needs. " Elena squeezed her hand beneath the table.
Matt rubbed the back of his neck. "Maybe Cristian is telling the truth," he offered. "Chloe left Ethan and stopped drinking blood. There are good vampires - we know that. Look at Stefan. "
"Where is Chloe, anyway?" Bonnie asked. "You've been spending all your time with her. "
"Stefan took her hunting in the woods," Matt told her. "She's afraid to go by herself since Klaus attacked her, but Stefan says if she's going to survive, she can't hide forever. And I have a game later, so Stefan can keep her company, help her stave off the blood lust. "
"At least it sounds like Cristian wants to try," Elena told Meredith. "I'm scared I've lost Damon. He was so violent. It was like he wanted me to give up on him. " She hadn't told Meredith and the others that Damon had confessed so casually to killing someone, but she'd told them about the brutal, frightening scene at the billiards hall.
Meredith stared down at the surface of her tea for a moment, then raised her eyes to meet Elena's. "Maybe you should," she said quietly.
Elena shook her head in immediate denial, but Meredith pushed on. "You know what he's capable of, Elena," she said. "If he really wants to be bad again, he's strong enough and clever enough to be really bad. The Guardians might be right. Maybe he's even a bigger threat than Klaus. "
Elena clenched her fists. "I can't, Meredith," she said, her voice cracking. "I can't. And I can't let anyone else, either. It's Damon. " Her eyes met Meredith's. "Cristian's your family - that's why you can't kill him without giving him a chance. Well, Damon's become my family, too. "
Bonnie looked back and forth between them, wide-eyed. "What can we do?" she asked.
"Listen," Matt said suddenly. "Meredith was a hunter when she met Stefan and Damon, even though the rest of us didn't know it. She hated vampires, right?" They all nodded. "So" - he turned to Meredith - "how did you get past it?"
Meredith blinked. "Well," she said slowly, "I knew Stefan wasn't a killer. He loved Elena so much, and he tried to protect people. Damon . . . " She hesitated. "For a long time, I thought I probably would have to kill Damon. It was my duty. But he changed. He fought on the right side. "
She looked back down at the table, her face grim. "Duty is important, Elena," she said. "A hunter or a Guardian, we are the ones responsible for saving innocent people from evil. You can't ignore that. " Elena's eyes filled with tears.
"Exactly," Matt said. "So, what if Damon changes again? If we could get him to act differently - well, if you guys could, anyway; he won't ever listen to me - then we could show the Guardians he's not a threat. "
"There's a reason the Guardians aren't worried about Stefan," Bonnie added.
"Maybe," Elena said. She felt her shoulders drooping and automatically stiffened her spine. She wasn't going to give up, no matter how hopeless the idea of getting Damon to change his behavior seemed. "Maybe I can get him back on track. It didn't work the first time, but that doesn't mean I can't try another approach," she said, willing a little more positivity into her voice. She would just have to keep going, think of a way to get Damon on the side of good again.
"Or we could try locking him up until he changes," Matt suggested half jokingly. "Maybe Bonnie and Alaric can come up with some kind of calming spell. We'll figure something out. "
"That's the ticket," Meredith said. Elena looked up at her and Meredith gave her a small, rueful smile. "Maybe Damon will change in time to save himself," Meredith said. "And maybe Cristian is telling the truth. If we're lucky enough, neither of them will have to die. " She reached across the table and squeezed Elena's hand. "We'll try," she said, and Elena nodded, squeezing back.
"At least we have each other," Elena said, looking around to meet Bonnie's and Matt's sympathetic gazes. "No matter what happens, it'll never be the worst thing, not as long as you guys are by my side. "
Chapter 30
Unlike his brother, who had gone so far as to join the Robert E. Lee High School football team in Fell's Church, Damon did not enjoy playing football. He had never liked team sports, even when he was young and alive. The feeling of being an anonymous part of an a group, just one cog in a great machine designed to get a ball from one end of a field to another, felt like an affront to his dignity. It didn't help that Matt - Mutt, Damon now had to remind himself to say - loved the sport. He was the star here on the Dalcrest field; Damon had to give him some credit for that.
But now, some five hundred years after he had stopped breathing, he certainly didn't bother to waste his time watching humans try to get a ball from one side of a field to another.
The crowd, on the other hand . . . he'd found that he liked the crowd at a football game.