Dirty Secret

"Because I'm an athlete?"

She shakes her head. "Because you're tough."

"Really? Everyone thinks I look nice."

"Sure, you look like someone who will give me directions. But when you turn on that fire, the way you do when you talk about sports—you look like you'll destroy anyone in your way."

That's probably true.

"Whereas I have a resting bitch face." She laughs. "But it's nice in its own way. People don't mess with me."

"What about guys who are into tough babes?"

"Nothing stops them."

"You probably got that a lot. At your old job. I know Indie did and that place wasn't…"

"A strip club?"

"It was supposed to refined."

"Devil's Point was not trying to be refined. The most popular dancers were playing up blonde bimbo stereotypes."

"Like Britney?"

"Yeah. She's usually in a schoolgirl skirt and pigtails. Guys eat it up. But the owner wanted a lot of different types of women, so he could cater to all tastes. He hired me because he didn't have any 'punk bitches.' He thought I'd start dancing after a few weeks, when I saw the dancers were making four or five times what I was."

"Why didn't you?"

"I don't know. I thought I'd be able to do it. I thought I was the kind of person who did what it takes, even if it took touching strange men. But I couldn't get past it. The men at the club acted like twenty dollars bought them carte blanche."

"Did it?"

"Not exactly. But, well… let me demonstrate. Try to touch me and I'll stop you."

"Try to touch you?"

She laughs. "It doesn't have to be sexual."

Okay… I reach for her shoulder.

She grabs my arm and says, "don't" in a firm voice. "That's how I want to stop you. I can trust you to take it, because you're a uh—"

"Tactless bitch?"

"You appreciate directness."

I nod.

"But if you were a guy, or my boss, I might have to be a little softer." She cops a gentle voice. "'Please don't.' Or 'not right now.'"

"Of course."

"But the way dancers have to do it… do it again."

Okay. I reach for her shoulder again.

This time, she doesn't stop me. She lets my hand graze her shoulder. Then she giggles as she gently takes my wrist and moves my hand to my side. "Not yet, sweetie."

"They have to politely ask the guys not to grope them?"

"Basically."

No wonder she always wants to talk about dismantling the patriarchy. I've seen plenty of guys act like creeps. I saw a lot of guys hit on Indie at Rick's, but everyone was dressed. "Indie had to do the same thing, at Rick's, but with requests for sex. Never… so direct." I swallow another sip. "I can't imagine you putting up with that?"

"The punk bitch thing bought me a little latitude."

"But you still had to smile when guys asked if they could fuck you?"

"Or tried to grab my ass. But mostly, I was behind the bar, so it was a lot of pretending I didn't mind guys were talking to my boobs."

"But not always?"

"Not always," she says.

"Is that where you met Ian?" I ask.

"Kind of."

"Kind of?"

"It's a long story," she says. "And I'm sure you're sick of us."

A laugh spills from my lips. I motion a little.

"Were we obnoxious at the party?"

"I hate to be the one to break this to you, Eve, but the two of you are always obnoxious."

She laughs too. "Will you forgive me?"

"Maybe… let's hear your case."

"You have looked at him."

"A persuasive argument, but I'm mostly immune to Hunt charms," I say. "After so many dinners with Ty."

She raises a brow are you.

I blush. "I, uh, he is handsome. I'll concede that point."

"You don't think he's sexy?"

"Not so sexy I'd be totally unable to control myself."

"Fair." She laughs. "Completely fair."

"It's kind of amazing you two are that… hungry after a year."

She nods. "It's not the same as it was at first. I don't have that desperate need to consume every ounce of experience."

That's exactly how it feels.

"But I… well, I still need him. I need his love and his touch and his support. And, lately, with Ty's wedding… I can tell it brings up memories. I can tell when he's tensing and I just…"

"Want to relieve that tension?"

"I want him to feel something else, but yes." She looks at me. "It's not always about sex."

"Says the girl who makes out with her boyfriend every time I see her."

She nods busted.

"Does it bother you that he's upset about his ex-wife?"

"No."

"That he doesn't want to get married again?"

She shakes her head. "I never wanted to marry."

"Really? But he's so rich. And handsome. You have to lock that down."

She laughs. "It's the practical thing to do."

"Yeah, even with a prenup. I bet he'll offer a lot."

Her laugh gets louder. "Do you really believe that, Sienna?"

"That he'll offer you a lot in the prenup? Of course. He's crazy about you. You two are the only people who don't think you'll get married."