“Look, about Thane—”
“Delilah, I thought I wanted to know what happened but based on what your father said and how you react when Thane’s brought up, I assume it has to do with a miscarriage or something.”
I look to him, my bottom lip trembling with sudden vulnerability. I feel as if he’s cracking me open and tearing out my darkest secrets and shame. Reaching over, he grasps my hand and holds it tight and a sob racks my body, tears filling my eyes. I feel like the worst mother in the world. I can’t be around pregnant women or babies without thinking of my own loss.
“Tell me all about it when it’s easier for you, I refuse to have you relive something that makes you break like this, D. You’re the strongest person I know and seeing you like this hurts me.”
He gives my hand a gentle squeeze and I look up, my heart falling for him a little more. Fingers sliding up my wrist and he jerks me next to him, I nestle against him. I want to tell him everything, but just thinking about what he’ll say in return has me scared. He throws the blankets over us and holds me as if I’m some fragile doll. Nobody has held me like this. He’s so strong where I am weak, and gentle where I am overbearing. He’s a piece of my reality I’ve been missing and every second I spend with him, I come to terms that I’m falling in love with him. My past makes me feel like I don’t deserve love or happiness but Lee treads through that darkness and makes me believe that there’s more for me.
I never thought I’d ever fall in love. I’m not worthy of the affection. Too cold and hard to accept something so soft and caring.
Yet here I am, melting into a man that both infuriates me and makes me feel like the only girl in the world.
The sheets are warm from him and I lay my head on his chest, throwing one of my legs over his.
Fingers edge into my hair, running through the strands, and I close my eyes.
“So, what’s next?” His voice vibrates through his chest and into my ear.
Sighing, I say, “I don’t know. Get a job, find a place, hope my dad doesn’t kill you trying to make you prove yourself.”
“Stop worrying about me, babe.” His hand caresses my head, slipping me into a trance, and I can’t help but hum.
I wish I could stop worrying about him but he’s like family, I’ll always be concerned about him. My father aside, I’m also scared about him getting in a motorcycle accident, or shot during a job with my dad.
“You know, you shouldn’t get a job.”
My eyes snap open, my trance of relaxation slowly fading. I’m praying he isn’t going to say some stupid shit about taking care of me and I should just stay home. I’m not that girl.
“You should open your own business here, detailing bikes. It’s the perfect place for it.”
Tension in my neck eases and I lift my head back just enough to look up at him. Is he serious? I can’t run a business.
“I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
“Apply for a loan, find a building. You’ve already got your name out around here, so customers will follow you and sales will build.” He shrugs as if it’s an easy task but the whole thing seems out of my league.
I’ve always envisioned myself working for some big company, but never actually being the big company.
“This is LA, anything is possible here.”
Lowering my head back on his chest, I look out the window and ponder the thought. I wouldn’t even need to apply for a loan, come to think of it. My grandpa left me money in his will when he died, I think my parents have it. I don’t know, they mentioned it to me around the time of the funeral and the thought of money at such a grim time seemed wrong to me, so I never asked about it since.
But this, this seems like it might be put to good use. I can have my own company, work on what I want, hire who I want. The idea has merit.
“Yeah, maybe,” I mutter, biting my bottom lip at the thought of it all.
23
Big Chief / Lee
Two Days Later
Pulling my jeans up my feet are fucking killing me standing on them but I gotta get out of this bedroom. I’ve had worse injuries bull riding, I can deal with some cut feet. Jesus, just saying it in my head makes me sound like a pussy.
Putting on the shirt Delilah left on the dresser, I grab my boots and finish getting dressed. I’m taking Delilah to look at some vacant buildings today. She seems nervous about the idea of starting a business as if she’s incapable of such a thing as running her own company. It’s insane, she’s smarter than she thinks, and I’m going to make her see it. I know she wants to do this because I see the excitement of the idea glimmer in her eyes, she just needs the push.