Rafe could tell we were losing our humanity. Especially me. He decided our wolves required more space and freedom for the safety of everyone around us. The Colonel agreed and had reasons to want us as private contractors, instead. He arranged an honorable discharge with healthy retirement packages then hired us for the same type of missions we were doing before, only now the government could claim no knowledge of us if things went wrong. A privilege they are willing to pay handsomely for.
But for me and my wolf, it was too late. My wolf loves the thrill of the kill and always would. Even now, a year into retirement, my wolf is savage. Broken. Rafe tried to save me, I’m already too far gone.
I ride my bike right into the giant hanger we use as a garage. When I turn the engine off, the silence assaults my ears. I prefer the noise and vibration of the motorcycle—the riot calms the demons inside me.
“Deke.” My alpha steps out from behind the Humvee. He’s not fooling anyone—I scented him as soon as I rode up.
“Alpha,” I say. A growl tinges my voice without me meaning it too. My wolf is amped up, ready to fight. Like always.
“You smell like that human,” Rafe says.
I grunt and pick up a clean cloth hanging from a hook on the wall by the tool rack. I swipe it over my leather seat, pretending to clean off a bit of mud.
“You think I didn’t scent her on you last night?” Rafe jerks his nose into the air and sniffs. “Civilian. Sadie Diaz. Kindergarten teacher. Her ancestors were original Spanish settlers in the area. Father’s on the city council. Scott Sears is her ex.”
A growl rumbles in my chest. “You looked into her.”
“Course I did. I haven’t seen you so interested in a human before.”
“It’s nothing,” I lie. Which is stupid because any shifter can tell when someone’s lying. I toss the cloth away. “I’ll probably never see her again.” My wolf snarls at the thought.
“You won’t see her again,” my alpha says firmly.
Fuck this. I snarl again, this time out loud, and stomp out of the hanger.
“You can’t claim her, Deke,” Rafe calls after me. “You don't know what your wolf will do.”
He’s right. My wolf is a monster, out of control. The only thing I’m good at is killing. And one day, I’ll go too far, and my pack will have to put me down.
I can’t see Sadie again.
It’s for the best.
Chapter 4
Sadie
This morning my eyes are gritty, and I’m exhausted. If my kids or fellow teachers notice my smile is a bit forced, they don’t say anything.
I didn’t cry over Deke. I barely defended him to my friends. They left after I gave them a half-hearted promise to let them know if Scott makes another move.
I don’t care about Scott. My thoughts are consumed by the big biker and our supernova kiss. I barely knew Deke, and my heart feels empty, like he already made a place for himself, and now he’s gone.
I bring the motorcycle cookies to my classroom. Charlie stole two last night, but there are still plenty.
We’re out for recess when one of my students tugs on my skirt. “Miss Sadie, there’s a man here to see you.”
Sure enough, there’s Scott in navy slacks and a tie with a bouquet of red roses crossing the parking lot towards our enclosed playground. My lip curls. Roses? So cliché. I pull out my phone to text Charlie that she won the bet.
I signal to my fellow teachers that I’m going to go deal with this and march to the gate. Scott smiles when he sees me. I can practically see him flip a switch to “charming.” His thinning hair blows in the breeze. No amount of fancy product can hide the fact that he’ll eventually go bald. It’s petty of me to look forward to it, but if Scott cared half as much for being a decent person as he does his grooming, he’d might be tolerable to be around maybe.
Why did I ever date him? Was I really that desperate for my dad’s approval?
“Scott.” I cross my arms over my chest. “What are you doing here?”
“Council meeting next door. But I knew I would see you.” He proffers the flowers. I raise a brow.
“I can’t accept these. We’re not together any more.” Darn him for putting me in this position in front of my students.
The smile slips a little from Scott’s face. “Why not? Sadie, we were good together.”
I can’t help it. I half laugh. It’s so far from the truth, it’s funny. Amazing I never saw it that way before.
Scott’s smile is gone now, and I catch a glimpse of something else, something ugly. “You’re not acting like yourself, Sadie. You’re not usually like this.”