Deviant (Boys of Winter 3)

Without hesitation, everybody in the room raises to their feet, and the soft, grievous music changes to something equally as chilling and heartbreaking. Every eye in the room fills with unshed tears.

Every head turns to the grand entrance of the cathedral, and as I peer through the bodies blocking my view, I find King standing among seven other men, all of which are heads of Dynasty, carrying Tobias’ casket.

My heart sinks as I imagine the horrendous weight now resting on King’s shoulders, but just as he had said in the car—he has no choice but to be strong. For his mother, for his brother and sister, and for the rest of Dynasty looking in and watching his every move, waiting to find his weaknesses. They won’t find any though, not when it comes to King.

The walk from the entrance of the cathedral to the front of the church seems to go on forever, and as King passes us, I can’t help but meet his stare. To me, he looks broken, but to the outside world, he looks like the only person in this impressive building who has his shit together.

The men take the casket to the very front and place it down on the table that has been patiently awaiting Tobias’ arrival.

King hesitates at the front of the church. He looks back toward me sitting among his friends before glancing at his mother. Realizing that now is more important than ever to make an impression, he walks to his mother’s side and drops down next to her.

The ceremony is lovely and exactly what I had hoped for Tobias. Taking a page out of King’s book, I try my hardest to hold my composure for the people around me. For the most part, I think it works. That is until Tobias’ wife takes a stand behind the dais and looks out at the crowd of bodies, all watching her with tear-stained eyes.

She clears her throat and unfolds a stack of papers before lying them on the dais before her. Her hands shake and everything inside of me breaks.

This isn’t a position she thought that she’d be in quite so soon. She would have been hoping for at least another thirty years with her husband by her side. At least, if I were married and deeply in love with a guy, I’d want to have the rest of my life with him … hell, or them.

King’s mom takes a shaky breath and quickly glances at her children, scanning over their faces and desperately searching for the strength to say what she needs to say. A single tear falls from her eye and drops to her papers. She follows it down and stares for just a moment before scooping the papers into her shaky hands. “Thank you all for being here today,” she starts, her voice already breaking. “Tobias would have been so grateful for all the love and support you’ve shown to us in this difficult time. He … he was quite a man, and so it is with a heavy heart that we must say goodbye to him today.”

Sobs tear through the cathedral and all eyes turn to Caitlin sitting in the front row beside her big brother. King instantly puts his arm around her, holding her tight to his chest and desperately trying to make this day just a little bit easier for his baby sister.

King’s mom goes to continue, but her gaze sweeps back to her daughter and her resolve breaks. “I … I first met Tob—” Deep, heaving sobs pull from within her as she falls forward and catches herself against the dais. Her head tilts forward, trying to mask her face from the crowd of bodies watching her breakdown.

King instantly pushes his little sister into his brother’s arm and stands. He straightens his suit, fastens the button, and holds his chin high. I watch as he walks over to his mother and gently pulls her into his arms. King positions himself in front of the dais, and in an incredible show of strength, he looks out to his father’s final guests and picks up exactly where his mother left off. “I first met Tobias in school. I was twelve and he was the popular jock who I never thought I’d be good enough for. I instantly hated him. If someone had told me back then that Tobias King would be the love of my life, my husband, and the father of my children, I would have called them a liar. Tobias King changed my life.”

And just like that, the tears fall down my cheeks and splash against my legs, staining my dress as King goes on, his voice hypnotic and soothing as he tells his mother’s story, giving her the strength to be able to say her final goodbye.