With shaky fingers, he shoved her hair away from her face. Her lids fluttered open, but a sheen of sweat had popped up over her forehead. Was she that nervous about being here?
“I know you don’t want me here, but I have to tell you something.”
She pushed from the wall, swaying slightly.
Now he didn’t resist contact. Ryker grabbed her around the waist and held her against him. “Are you all right?”
“Let me go.”
Those vibrant green eyes came up to meet his. The punch to his gut instantly forced him back to that night, to her pinned between his body and the wall. She’d panted his name as she’d clung to his back. Never had he experienced anything so...perfect. And he didn’t deserve one second of her affection. Mac and Braden would kick his ass if they knew... Well, they’d try, anyway. He could handle himself in a fight, but he deserved at least a punch to the face over the way he’d seduced Laney like she was just another woman he’d met on one of his trips. Laney was nothing like those other women, and he needed to remember that.
Ryker dropped his hands but didn’t step back. He couldn’t, not when she still seemed so unsteady and his body was wound so tightly. She was a drug, his drug. They were bad for each other for too many reasons, yet he wanted more.
“I’m pregnant.”
Ryker stilled. Had she just...
What the hell? He hadn’t heard her right. No way. When they’d been in Miami, he hadn’t planned on having sex with her after the party at the new O’Shea’s location, but she’d assured him she was on birth control. So, no. He hadn’t heard right.
But Laney continued to stare up at him, and Ryker waited for her to say something else, anything else, because there was no way in hell...
“I’m sorry.” Laney leaned her head back against the wall and shut her eyes once more. “I didn’t know how else to say it. I mean, there’s really no good lead-in to something like this.”
Pregnant. As in, a baby. Their baby.
Ryker turned away as dread consumed him. How the hell had he allowed something like this to even be a possibility? A child was definitely not something he ever wanted in his life. No damn way would he purposely bring an innocent baby into this world. Into his darkness.
“You said you were on birth control.”
He didn’t mean for the words to come out as an accusation, but he was confused, damn it. And angry. Angry at himself, because had he kept that control of his in line, Laney wouldn’t be dropping this bomb.
“I was.” She pulled in a breath and squared her shoulders. “I had to switch the one I was on and started a new one the week before Miami. I don’t know if that’s why it happened. I just don’t know...”
He remembered so clearly her tugging his shirt over his head and telling him she was on birth control, that she had just had a physical and was clean. He knew full well he hadn’t been with anyone for a while, and he’d never gone without protection. So in their frantic state of shedding clothes and getting to the good stuff, they’d had a two-second conversation about contraception.
So here they were. Laney was expecting his child and he was...screwed. Literally.
Bracing his hands on the antique table behind the sofa, Ryker dropped his head. He’d kept his hands, and all his other parts, to himself this whole time. Out of respect for the family who took him in and saved his life, Ryker hadn’t given in to the one desire he’d had for years. Until Miami, damn it. How would he ever make things right with the O’Sheas?
Patrick had taken Ryker in at the age of twelve when Ryker had stood up for Braden and Mac on the playground, and the boys had become best friends. Ryker had instantly become like family, but he’d never thought of Laney as a sister. At the time, he’d ignored her because she was so much younger. But by the time she graduated high school, Ryker was deep in the family business, and more than aware that his dirty hands should never touch the sophisticated Laney O’Shea.
When her computer hacking skills were made apparent, Ryker knew she’d be an asset. He’d just had no idea how difficult it would be to work with her. He could afford to hire anyone to do the behind-the-screen work, but he trusted only her.
Braden and Mac were going to kill him. They would kill him and bury his body, and no one would ever know...and he deserved nothing less.
Damn it. Ryker blew out a breath. This was how he repaid the family who trusted him, who was loyal to him when no one else cared?
“This isn’t your fault.”
Her soft voice washed over him, and he let out a curt laugh. “No? Am I the one who pushed his way into your room, tore that dress off and demanded you wrap your legs around me? Or was that another man?”
He threw her a glance just in time to see her flinch. Great. Now he was being an ass. All of this was on him. Laney didn’t deserve his anger—she was just as innocent as the child.
His gaze dropped to her flat stomach, and fear engulfed him. Images of his biological father flooded his mind, and Ryker vowed that second to never be that man. Never would he lay a hand on his child, never would he choose the next fix over putting food on the table.
Ryker’s childhood may be a sad cliché, but that was life and all too often kids were mistreated while other adults turned a blind eye to the abuse.
Ryker looked down. Random scars covered his knuckles, his forearms. His life was made up of more ugly than anything else, yet this beautiful, vibrant woman stood here giving him something so precious and all he wanted to do was...