He didn’t join me. Instead, he stood in front of me, eyeing me before speaking. “Let me finish before you say anything. Okay?”
I couldn’t seem to find my voice, so I simply nodded.
“I want to be really pissed off at you right now. No, forget that, I am really pissed off at you. ” He stopped talking, took a deep breath, and ran his tanned fingers through loose strands of his black hair. “Listen, I know we’re both fucked up. We both have trust issues and this thing happening between us is scary as hell. ” He wagged his finger, his eyes avoiding mine.
“But when I told you I loved you, I meant it. I didn’t mean that I’d love you only if it was easy, or only if it was drama-free. I think we both know life isn’t like that. ” I watched his face twisting with emotion as my eyes began to fill with tears.
“I know it’s not easy to be with me. Dating me means that you have to deal with some pretty crazy shit that other people don’t and I’m sorry for that. All the things you’re just now being exposed to, I’ve had years to deal with. I’m used to it…the crazy pictures, the girls, the fan pages, the blogs, the reporters, the scouts, all the social media stuff. ”
He shrugged his shoulders as his eyes met mine. “And I know that the past version of me is someone you would never trust. But who I am when I’m with you” he paused, “isn’t who I used to be. I don’t think I’ve been that guy since the night of our first date, so it’s not fair that you judge me like I’m still him. ”
He settled his body next to mine on the edge of the bed. “If we’re going to do this, then you have to trust me. And you can’t shut me out or ignore me when things get uncomfortable. ”
It felt like hours of silence passed before I asked, “Can I talk now?”
He laughed. “Yeah. ”
“I’m really sorry, Jack. I know you haven’t done anything to deserve my mistrust, but it’s just that I saw those pictures and I felt so stupid. I’d just told you not to make me look dumb or embarrass me, and I felt like that’s exactly what you did. I went into self-preservation mode where nothing else mattered but me. ” I tried to explain my craziness in a way I hoped he’d understand. That basically, he was dating someone with serious trust issues.
His arm swept around my back and pulled me toward him. I allowed a few teardrops to fall before wiping them away. “You make me fucking crazy, but I love you. ” He pressed his warm lips against my temple.
“So you’re not breaking up with me?” I asked with a pout.
“You’re not that lucky. ”
TEN
JACK
“Kitten, come on, we’re gonna be late!” I shouted toward Cassie’s bathroom in between paces.
“I’m coming, hold on!” I heard the sound of clanking against the countertop and feet shuffling.
“Okay, I’m ready,” she announced as she entered the living room.
My jaw dropped at the sight of her tanned legs in that little white sundress. I scanned every inch of her body, my eyes loving each curve. I shook my head and smiled. She seriously looked like a fucking angel. And I wanted to be her devil.
“Kitten, you’re gonna give Gramps a heart attack looking like that. ”
Melissa’s laughter echoed from her bedroom. “Please don’t kill Jack’s grandpa, Cass. Not a good first impression. ”
Cassie giggled in response. “I’ll do my best. ” Her bright green eyes focused on mine. “See you later. ”
I stuffed my cell phone into my pocket before reaching for Cassie’s hand. She locked her fingers in mine as I led her toward the door. “See you later, Melissa,” I shouted toward her bedroom.
“Bye, you guys. Have fun!”
I ushered Cassie outside with a light slap to her ass and when she turned to smack me, she stopped and simply smiled instead. God, I loved this girl.
“You look beautiful,” I said, running my fingers through the soft golden waves in her hair.
“Thank you. ” She smiled and hesitated at the side of my car before I helped her up and inside.
I glanced over at the girl to my right and noticed her fidgeting with her hair. Shit. She’d actually curled it and I was going to fuck mess it all up on the drive. I should have borrowed Gran’s Honda.
“Here. ” I tossed my baseball cap into her lap.
“What’s this for?”