“No. Because if it were me and Nick Fisher, I would have liked hearing them too.”
“Really?” Her admission made me feel a thousand times better about my reaction, made me feel less weak.
“Really. But I don’t like that he did all that. It’s not fair to you.”
“Ha! I said the same thing.”
“I’m sure he really cared,” she said with a groan.
“Like I said.” I paused. “Drunk.”
“Like I always say.” She mimicked my dramatic pause. “Selfish prickface.”
I laughed. “Since when do you always say that about Nick?”
“Since now. Since right fucking now.”
She was pissed, and no one was safe when Rachel got truly angry. She would lash out at the cause of her fury until they apologized or righted their wrongs.
Nerves suddenly shot through me. “Don’t talk to him, Rachel. Don’t say anything. This isn’t your battle, okay?” When she didn’t respond, I said, “I’m asking you nicely. Please. This isn’t on you.”
The last thing I wanted was Rachel chasing Nick down and giving him a piece of her mind. It wasn’t her place. Plus, if anyone was going to yell at Nick, it should be me.
A loud huff sounded in my ear. “Fine, chica. I will do my best.”
We stayed on the phone a little longer, neither of us saying much, but her presence helped calm me down.
I looked at the clock. It was past five. “He’s definitely not coming. What do I do?”
“You move on. Get over him. Instead of it being one hell of a grand gesture, it was the asshole move of the century.”
I nodded in agreement with my best friend’s assessment. “I know it wasn’t realistic. It’s not like I could have left with him. But I’m so fucking disappointed, Rachel. Why am I so disappointed? Why am I like this when it comes to him?”
“Because you still love him. And you want him to fight for you. But instead of fighting, he’s giving up. And that’s twice now.”
I sniffed and tried to swallow the bitter truth in her words. She was right. That was twice now. And I did want the fight . . . I wanted to be worth it. And Nick not showing up only proved to me once more how much I wasn’t.
“Are you going to call him?” she asked, breaking through my thoughts.
“No.”
“Really?”
“I can’t. What if he says he doesn’t remember calling me last night? Or that it was a mistake, that he was drunk and didn’t mean anything that he said? I can’t handle hearing that from him. I can’t handle hearing him take it all back,” I admitted as my emotions started to get the best of me.
“Then can I offer you a terrible suggestion?”
I laughed. “Yes. I expect nothing less.”
“They always say that the best way to get over a guy is to get under a new one. Go sleep with some random hottie.”
“You know I can’t do that.” I wasn’t a one-night-stand kind of girl, and I didn’t hook up with guys I wasn’t at least interested in.
“I know you’re not, but it was worth a shot. Promise me you’ll try and meet someone else. Please. Go out. Drag Brooke to some frat parties. You need to try to get over Nick once and for all.”
I sat there shaking my head, the very idea seeming impossible. “I’m not ready,” I said honestly. “I will be. Hopefully soon. But right now I’m just not ready.”
And I wasn’t. No matter how hard I wanted Nick to be a part of my past so I could move on without thinking about him, I simply wasn’t there yet. I still woke up thinking about him every morning. My heart still ached when I thought of him. Memories of us were still the last thing that played in my mind each night before I fell asleep.