Dear Heart, I Hate You

“You can’t watch me,” I said as my face heated.

“Okay, but do what I told you.” Playing along, he closed his eyes.

“No peeking,” I warned before bringing the glass to my mouth and breathing it in. The scent of the bourbon mixed with the air and traveled down my throat and into my belly. After a moment, I repeated the process twice more like he’d suggested, enjoying sensing the alcohol like this instead of drinking it.

“Can I watch yet?” he asked, squinting his eyes tighter, and I laughed.

“Yes.”

Cal’s eyes opened and met mine instantly, capturing me. It was as if no one else existed around us. I heard nothing else, saw no one else. My new friend Robin wasn’t there at the table in this hotel lobby, and neither were his coworkers. Cal and I were the only two people in the entire hotel, as far as I was concerned.

Glancing at my mouth, he licked his lips. I willed my body not to react, but it heated anyway.

He reached out again and squeezed the top of my leg before resting his hand there as if that was where it belonged. On my body. Touching me. And I couldn’t remember what I had been doing before that moment. One touch from him caused my thoughts to scatter.

“Take a drink.”

That’s right. I was supposed to be drinking this damn bourbon. I stopped focusing on his hand caressing the inside of my thigh and stared at the glass.

I tilted it back, sipping it like he had instructed, and I almost couldn’t believe it when the liquid didn’t burn me up from the inside out like it always had before. Everything about it tasted completely different. It was tolerable, good even, to drink it straight when you followed Cal’s advice.

“And?”

“I guess there is a right way to drink bourbon,” I said with a nod, pushing the glass back toward him.

“Was it good?”

“It actually was. I’m impressed.”

“I’m pretty impressive,” he said, and smiled at me with a mock smugness.

I stared at his smile, wanting to photograph that mouth for all the world to see. No, not the world. Just me. I wanted photographic proof of those lips. What if I never saw them again after tonight? I was pretty sure I’d die if I didn’t get to kiss them.

Dramatic, yes, but this man woke up the sleeping beast that had lain dormant inside my chest for so long. It was all his fault that my heart decided to come back to life the moment it found him.

“Where did you learn about the right way to drink bourbon?” I asked.

“My best friend, Lucas, the one who said hi before running out of here earlier, he’s from Kentucky.”

I raised my eyebrows as I waited for him to explain. When he didn’t, I simply said, “Kentucky?”

“Yes, Jules. Kentucky. The bourbon capital of the United States.” He looked at me like I was crazy.

“I didn’t know,” I said with a shrug. “I think of horses when I think of Kentucky.”

“They have those too. Horses and bourbon.” He nudged his shoulder against mine before his tone turned serious. “When do you leave?”

“Two days. You?”

“We check out tomorrow morning.”

“Oh.”

Well, that sucked. I wanted Cal to be here at the hotel for as long as I was. That might have been an unrealistic expectation, but it was how I felt. I enjoyed his company and didn’t want this to end yet. Was it too forward to want to spend more time with him?

“Two days, huh?” He cocked his head to the side.

“Yep.”