I nod, then after a second, I blurt out, “I have a date, too.”
“Really? Got one of the girls to go with you, even after the whole tiny dick thing?”
Again, I know I shouldn’t be angry but that still gets my hackles up.
“Actually, I got Olive to ditch Jasper and come with me instead.”
I expect Rafael to be angry. To warn me. To yell at me for putting both of us in the line of fire yet again. But the exhaustion must have finally gotten to him because he just throws his head back and laughs such a big belly laugh that it’s contagious.
“How?” he asks once he’s once again able to form words.
“Uh—well—remember the lacrosse game?”
“Uh-huh, I remember.” He’s wheezing.
I tell him the whole story … minus Heath being all strung out on Adderall. I just say he didn’t show up. I don’t know why I feel so compelled to keep his secret after everything, but I still do.
It feels so, so good to talk to Rafael again, to see his gleeful face as I spill the drama I’ve been dealing with. I feel like I only now realize just how much I’ve been missing him.
“So, after that, I came up here, called Olive, and asked her to the dance,” I tell Rafael, finishing up the story. “She said she’d tell Jasper she was going with someone else.”
“I should have guessed,” Rafael gasps. “No offence, Alex, but really I don’t see what that girl sees in you.”
I grin. “Apparently she’s just really into guys who really aren’t into her.”
“Phew. Tell me about it.” He’s still laughing. Tears roll down his face. “I’ve missed you, Alex. I don’t know how anyone could accuse you of having a tiny dick when you have that much big dick energy.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Even though I know taking Olive to the dance is still probably the most stupid, reckless decision I’ve ever made—even above sneaking into Bleakwood in the first place—somehow telling Rafael about it makes it seem a little less, well, deadly.
Jasper might be the most possessive person in the world, but it’s still only a dance.
Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself.
Olive is understanding of the fact that I don’t own a fancy car—or any car, for that matter—to pick her up in, so she gets her own transportation to Bleakwood. I meet her out front in a suit Rafael rented for from the village since he said he wouldn’t be caught dead having lent me something less than perfect.
His choice must be good because for the first time I don’t feel underdressed next to Olive, who’s wearing a knee-length cocktail dress outside in the snow.
“Come inside,” I say, as soon as she steps out of the vehicle. “Holy shit, you must be freezing!”
I know I am.
I grab her hand and start tugging her towards the door, thinking it’s the fastest way to get inside before too many people spot us together. I don’t want to end up dead before the dance even starts.
She laughs. “Beauty is pain.” She allows me to drag her across the courtyard.
“You must be in a lot of pain, then,” I say, not thinking totally about what I’m saying. She blushes. Oh, shit. I’m flirting again.
My guilt flares up again, but I have to stuff it down. It’s too late for that.
It was too late the moment I called Olive and asked her to dump Jasper and take me as her date tonight instead.
I lead Olive into the gymnasium where the dance is set up. I haven’t even been inside yet; Rafael’s been saying it looks completely different. At my old high school, before Bleakwood, we’d sometimes have dances, and we’d decorate with paper streamers and balloons from the dollar store. If we got fancy, we might even get a punch bowl.
Somehow, I’m betting the Bleakwood winter ball is in a whole other league.
As we walk, I start trying to formulate a plan as to how I’m going to break the news to Olive after the dance that I’m really not interested. Really not interested. Like, she needs to give it up already not interested.