The Write Stuff (Write Stuff 1)

I snatched up one of the extra pillows next to me and pressed it against my face. The sun was just beginning to rise and my eyes rejected the light. I'd tossed and turned the entire night, unable to get comfortable. The bed was too big. The room was too quiet. It seemed like everything was bound and determined to keep me up.

I squeezed my eyes closed beneath the pillow, wishing for a few hours of respite. The signing wasn't until later that afternoon. If I could have just turned my brain off and stopped thinking about Alec, I could have at least slept the time away.

An hour later, I finally gave up in frustration. I threw the pillow across the room, knocking over a table lamp and a half-empty can of Diet Coke I'd left there the night before.

Sighing, I grabbed tissues from a nearby box and tried mopping up the mess. The tissues were cheap and did nothing but fall apart as I blotted the carpet. Tossing a handful of shredded tissue pieces into the trash can, I stood up and headed for the bathroom. I was sick of this room. It was nothing but a constant reminder of our fight the night before. I wanted out.

I turned on the harsh and probing bathroom light, refusing to look at the oversized tub in the corner.

I climbed into the separate shower stall and made quick work of brushing my teeth and washing my face before leaving the bathroom in a hurry. There was a vanity mirror over the dresser near the bed where I did my hair and makeup. I opted out of blow-drying my hair, sweeping it up into a high ponytail instead. It may have been too casual for the signing, but I was past caring. I just wanted to escape the oppressiveness of the room.

Grabbing my gear for the signing, I decided to leave my banner behind. Putting it up was never easy, and I had gotten used to Alec taking care of it for me. I stowed my laptop in my shoulder bag, along with my phone and wallet. The signing wasn't for several hours, but the hotel had a Starbucks in the lobby, and I planned on getting a little work done.

With the exception of the day after the release of Wicked Lovely, I'd been slacking on my social media time during the past few weeks and figured I would take the opportunity to catch up. If I still found myself with extra time, I'd start to draft out the second book in the series.

Glad to have a plan that would keep me busy, I left my room and headed for the elevators. I felt a brief stirring of déjà vu as I heard the sound of a door opening behind me. My pulse quickened as my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. I could hear the sound of shoes swishing across the carpeted floor, but I couldn't bring myself to turn around. It was the first time I had found myself alone in a hotel hallway since the attack. An overwhelming sensation of fear clawed its way up my throat like a hungry beast. I was ready to scream.

"Hey, Nicole. Is that you? I didn't know you were on this floor," a familiar voice called after me, dousing my fear.

Turning around, I spotted Karen, an author I'd been friends with since the beginning. She was closer to my mom's age, but we'd formed a close bond after discovering our shared love for books and cats. "Karen," I said, exhaling. "I didn't know you were doing this signing."

She gave me a quick hug. "I signed on at the last minute when they had a cancellation. Where's the steamy cover model I've heard so much about? I've been stalking all the pictures these past few weeks. You two are too adorable for words. If my Stan and I weren't getting ready to celebrate our twentieth, I'd be awfully tempted to get my own hunk."

I blanched at her words. Up until now, I hadn't considered the fact that Alec and I weren't very discreet about our affair. Affair. It seemed like an odd choice to describe what we had shared, but I guess it was accurate. I had set out to lose my virginity, and Alec had given me more than he probably planned. That was all I should have expected and asked for. It certainly wouldn't be healthy to regret what happened. He'd made my first time special and hot as hell.

Karen was watching me intently when I realized I'd gone into one of my infamous silent modes. "Sorry. He had to go back home for a family emergency," I answered, mashing the button for the elevator.

"Well, nuts." She looked forlorn before flashing me a smile. "I guess it's a good thing. I may have been tempted to steal him from you. Lucky girl. Are you headed down for the signing already?" She had noticed the cart I wheeled onto the elevator.

"I decided to head down early so I can get a little work done. My room was too much of a distraction," I answered honestly. "Where are you headed?"

She grinned sheepishly. "I'm going to check out the Georgia Aquarium for a couple of hours. You want to come?"

I debated her question for a moment. If I went with her, it would help kill the morning before the signing, but it could also backfire if she continued to talk about Alec. "I better not. I've been a social media leper lately and I need to do some serious catching up. My notifications and messages on Facebook are pretty scary."

"Honey, I can completely relate. By the way, huge congratulations on Wicked Lovely! I told you that book would go big. It's your best work yet."

I blushed as the elevator doors opened, revealing a lobby full of people. "Thank you so much. And thank you for the blurb also." It helped to have a well known author provide a quote for the cover of the book.

"The honor was all mine. Are you sure you don't want to go check out some fish with me?"

I shook my head. "I better not. It's time I did a little work. Have fun though." I gave a little wave before heading toward the Starbucks.

"You too. Tell your hottie we miss him," she said, blowing a kiss at me.

My smile remained fixed until she walked out of the lobby. The moment she was out of sight, it dropped. In our short conversation I'd come to the conclusion that today was going to suck. Every single person who visited my table would expect to see Alec. I was going to have to field endless questions while smiling the entire time and pretending that my heart wasn't in shreds. Joy.

My foreshadowing proved to be dead on. By the time the signing ended later that evening, I was ready to stab myself in the eye with my Sharpie, which was too bad considering it had been a complete success. The event was bittersweet. The success of Wicked Lovely had brought me more attention than I had seen during the previous events. Even without Alec, readers still flocked to my table. Not that they weren't asking about him, which only made me miss him more. The anger I'd held on to the night before was long gone, and all I felt now was sadness for what I no longer had. Time and time again throughout the day, I would hear or see something that I knew we would have laughed over. It felt like I'd not only lost the man I loved, but a close friend.

I was tempted to text him. To ask about Lily, and to make sure he got home okay. I was searching for an excuse to maintain a connection to him.

Eventually, I stowed my phone at the bottom of my bag so I wouldn't cave. Alec had made his intentions clear, and I needed to retain the small shred of dignity I still had. I would not contact him again.

The evening was capped off by a special VIP reception for readers who had attended the signing. I had been able to cope during the day, but my sleepless night had finally caught up with me. I had become about as much fun as a zombie. I stuck around long enough to mingle with a few of the bloggers I knew before ducking out. I dragged myself up to my room and collapsed on my bed without bothering to undress.

A dreamless sleep welcomed me, which was all I could ask for.

***