I shook my head. "I don't anymore. Not in the slightest. I think that was just cold feet. Then at the hotel when he pulled out that jewelry box, I wanted to look inside so badly. I was just too afraid to ask. The thought of being rejected terrified me. I realize I'll have to earn his trust back, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes."
"I'm sure he knows that. You see? Sounds like you're already on the other side of the dark. Now, about the trip overseas. What happens if you tell them no?"
I shrugged. "I'm not sure. Maybe nothing. They'll replace me with another author. I'm worried about some kind of backlash later on. Everyone keeps talking about how much money has been sunk into the tour. It's obviously important to them. If I say no, I'm terrified I'll be making a detrimental mistake when it comes to signing future book deals."
"What is your heart telling you?"
I sighed. "My heart wants to go home. It's my brain telling me to be logical."
"Well, you have a few days to think about it. Tomorrow we'll drive up to Forks and maybe you'll feel inspired."
"I can't believe we're finally going. We've been talking about it for so long. I'm pretty excited."
"Me too. It was well worth putting up with all the teasing back home. So, what's our plan for the afternoon?" she asked, standing up.
"Originally I thought we could do some shopping for my UK trip, but with everything up in the air I'm not sure what to do now."
"Why don't we stick with that? I'm sure you have to be sick of wearing the same clothes every day. A few new outfits won't go to waste, even if you decide against going. I've always wanted to see Seattle, and it seems like a shame to waste another minute inside."
I stood up and gave her a hug. Our talk helped me more than I think she realized. "Thanks, Mom. I love you."
"I love you too, honey. I know you have a lot on your plate, but I promise you, whatever you decide will be the best decision for you. You have a solid head on your shoulders. Your father and I have always trusted you to make smart choices."
Her words gave me comfort through the afternoon as we discovered some of the delights Seattle had to offer. We laughed often, bought too much, and ate until our stomachs hurt. It was an afternoon that reminded me of my childhood. On occasion Mom would pick me up from school early and whisk me away for a girls' day out.
We ate dinner at a quaint restaurant not far from the hotel while we pored over a map on my phone, plotting our trip to Forks the following day. Going to La Push was definitely on the agenda, but we also planned on hitting any other touristy Twilight attractions in Forks.
It was drizzling the next morning when we set out, which made us both grin gleefully. It only seemed fitting to have weather appropriate for visiting the fictional setting of our favorite book series. Luckily we had thought to buy rainproof jackets while shopping the day before.
The drive to Forks passed quickly. All the trees were lush and green just as the character Bella described in the book. We laughed with delight as we approached the town's welcome sign. There was no way we could stop without taking our pictures with it. Being in Forks was a poignant reminder of why I started writing and how I needed to take every opportunity to continue doing what I loved. As the day progressed, the decision I'd been struggling with began tilting toward one obvious choice. Whether I would stick with it was another story.
We made the short drive to La Push, which turned out to be different than I anticipated, boasting oceanfront hotels and a large marina. Mom teased me that I should have known it wouldn't just be a small reservation with Jacob Black's house and nothing else. After driving through the area and taking pictures, we returned to Forks to do some antique shopping and grab a bite to eat. I managed to find the perfect surprise for Alec and stowed it in my bag, not wanting Mom to see it.
By the time we made it back to the hotel later that evening, Mom and I were exhausted but pleased with our day. I had made up my mind regarding the UK trip and went to bed feeling content.
The next morning, I got up early while Mom slept and went to the hotel lobby to call Greg to work out the logistics of my decision. It required a last-minute change in my itinerary, but he promised to take care of everything. When Mom woke an hour later, I ran my decision by her. She seemed pleased, which made me believe I made the right choice.
We packed up our things and checked out of the hotel in time to stop for breakfast before our flight to San Francisco. Between the final week of the tour being cancelled and the change I made to my itinerary, Frisco would now be a quick in-and-out trip for me. Mom would be sticking around an extra day to spend time with her college roommate, but I would be returning to the airport as soon as my signing at a local book store was finished. The more I thought about it, the more eager I became to get the day over with. It would be hectic and time crunched, but I knew I had made the right decision.
Chapter 23
It was late in the evening on the East Coast by the time my plane landed. Things were relatively quiet in the airport, with very few people walking around. I wasted no time getting to baggage claim and could barely contain myself as I stood tapping my foot while waiting for our flight's luggage to start sliding out of the chute. When the carousel began spinning, I felt like an old lady playing church bingo, praying to god that my numbers would be called. One bag after another appeared without mine showing itself. I became so anxious I caused a middle-aged man in a tie to nearly spill his coffee on himself when I screamed after seeing my suitcase fall from the chute. Throwing a halfhearted apology his way, I snatched my bag up and ran outside, hailing the first cab I saw.
I reached my destination with adrenaline pulsating through my veins. The taxi driver looked at me like I had two heads as he opened up the trunk and I reached around him and grabbed my suitcase. "Keep the change," I said, pressing a few bills into his hand. Honestly, I wasn't even sure how much I had given him, but judging by his enthusiasm, it had been more than enough.
My suitcase scraped along the sidewalk after it flipped to its side when I rolled over a rock. I didn't care. I was within steps of my objective. I rapped quietly on the door, feeling butterflies in my stomach as a light illuminated the room behind the curtains.
The look on Alec's face when he opened the door and found me on the threshold made everything worth the effort.
"Holy shit, Nicole. What are you doing here?" Alec said, sweeping me up in his arms and twirling me around. I'm sure we woke a few people in my complex, but I would make it up to them another day. Tonight was about happiness.
In the end, it was the only decision that made sense. Europe would be there when I was ready. For now, I was a writer and I needed to be home to do what I loved and to be with who I loved. "I told them no," I said, gasping as he dropped a searing kiss on my lips. I pulled back out of his arms after a moment. "Here, put me down. I need to ask you something," I said, pulling the surprise that I had bought him at the antique store in Forks from my pocket. I dropped down on one knee in front of him.
"What the hell are you even doing?" he asked, stepping backward.
"Alec Petropoulos—I know I've made some mistakes, but I love you more than anything. I can't imagine a world where I exist without you as part of my life. I promise my lips will never touch another's, and that my heart will only beat for you for as long as I have my breath. Will you do me the honor of becoming my lawfully wedded husband?"
Alec looked speechless as I remained on my knee, looking up into his eyes. They glistened in the light, hinting at a slight bit of moisture. His grin was broad and wide as he reached down with his strong arms and lifted me against his chest, placing a kiss as soft as rose petals against my lips.