“At least I react in some fashion, like any normal human. I’m not some freaking robot that can’t show any emotion,” he snarled, turning away from me. My heart dropped. We were never going to get past this. He thought I was emotionless, but he hadn’t been there to see what had really happened. I wouldn’t allow myself to dwell on how harsh he sounded, because I knew the truth.
6.
November 2010
“Where are we going?” I asked with Justin leading me by the hand from my dorm room. It had been a week since his art show and the day of our first date had finally arrived. I’d had serious doubts and even tried backing out. I pleaded with Melissa to lie and cover for me, but she wouldn’t budge.
“What the frick is your deal with this guy?” she asked, placing her hands on her hips for emphasis because somehow that made her point more clearly. “You’ve never been like this before. You’ve got your OCD issues when it comes to dating, and whatever that crazy one-date-only rule is, I’ll never understand, but usually you give the dude a chance.”
“I don’t know,” I sighed, sinking down on my bed. “Something about him just unsettles me.”
“Unsettles? Do you not trust him?” she asked, concerned. “Did he do something?” she added, looking as ferocious as her slight five-foot-one-inch frame would allow.
“Chill, mother hen. No, he just makes me feel weird, kind of jittery. I disliked him on sight, and yeah, maybe that was wrong and a bit presumptuous on my part. Especially considering at his art show I got a glimpse of a side of him I wasn’t expecting, but now I’m worried I’ll be disappointed because he’ll turn out to be the asshole I pegged him for in the first place.”
“That’s some messed-up logic,” she said, hitting me with a pillow. “It sounds to me like you like him and you don’t want to admit it.”
I shrugged my shoulders since she’d pretty much nailed it on the head.
“In that case then, no, I won’t lie for you. It’ll do you some good to forget about these preconceived notions of yours and realize that sometimes it takes more than one date to get to know someone. Besides, you’ve got to give a little to get a little.”
“I’m not like you. I don’t give anything on the first date,” I teased.
“Hey, whatever, slut, that’s not what I meant,” she squealed, tossing the pillow at my head.
“I’m kidding,” I laughed. “Anyway, I disagree. If the first date sucks, then why should I torment myself by going out a second time? Face it, Melissa, college guys are the same duds they were in high school. They’re just a little cockier and more persistent here,” I pointed out, since her track record wasn’t that much better than mine.
“Rob is different, though,” she replied. “And maybe Justin will be too.”
“So you say. Only time will tell,” I said, rising reluctantly from my bed so I could get dressed.
An hour later I wished I were still on my bed instead of heading out on some date, during the day no less, waiting for Justin to answer my question.
“If I tell you where we’re going, it’ll ruin the surprise, but I think you might like it,” he said, grinning confidently as he stopped in front of a beat-up jeep with no roof and no doors.
“You’re kidding, right?” I asked.
“What? You don’t like jeeps?” he asked, leading me to the passenger side.
“I’m not sure how I feel about them one way or another. I’ve never ridden in one. It’s just—you do realize you live in Seattle?”
“Sure, why?”
“Well, it’s not the most practical vehicle for this state, is it? You know the whole ‘no roof, no door, lots of rain’ thing. Not to mention, I could easily picture one sharp turn sending me tumbling out to become instant roadkill.” With those words, I pulled on my seat belt to make sure it was firmly latched.
“Aw, you’re not afraid to get a little wet, are you?” He cranked the engine, which started with a loud grumble before idling louder than I was used to. I’m sure the missing windows and roof were partly to blame for some of the noise, but not much.
“Not at all,” I answered. “Just tell me you at least have an umbrella.”
He laughed as we accelerated down the road. “Don’t worry, it has a roof and doors for rainy days and a soft top for the summertime, but when it’s cool like this with no rain in the forecast, I like to take it all off,” he said conversationally.
I nodded but didn’t answer since the wind whipping around us made it difficult to hear. I was glad I’d pulled my hair back before I left my room, since riding like this would have surely turned me into a striking replica of a scarecrow. The breeze was downright cold as we sped along, but surprisingly it felt kind of nice as it chilled my face. My fear of tumbling out the side of the jeep had faded as the exhilaration of the ride took over. There was an odd sense of freedom that came from speeding down the road with nothing boxing me in. I didn’t realize I was smiling until Justin commented on it.
“I knew you were a jeep kind of girl,” he said, pulling into a half-full parking lot.
“Seattle Aquarium?” I asked.
“It’s sort of my muse for a new series I’m working on,” he answered, hopping down from the jeep and heading over to my side. He pulled off his gloves and placed his hands on my chilled face. The warmth of his hands and his close proximity set me on edge.