“I don’t know,” I finally answered.
“Neither do I,” he said with disgust. He released my hand abruptly and scooted back to his side of the elevator. I watched with grief as he dropped his face to his hands. We had done this to each other. We took and took until we were stretched so thin that we became brittle and eventually shattered.
22.
New Year’s Eve 2010
“Oh, Brittni, you look beautiful,” Hollie breathed as I put the final touches on my appearance.
“Why thank you, sweets,” I said, giving her a squirt of my favorite perfume.
“I love your dress. The material is so silky smooth.”
“You should. You helped pick it out,” I reminded her.
“I know, but it looks even better fully accessorized,” she said, indicating the matching shoes and my hair, which was styled on top of my head in a mess of curls.
“Justin is going to flip when he sees you,” she added, flopping down on Justin’s bed while I added a few essentials to the small beaded evening bag I’d splurged on.
“He’d better. I spent a month’s salary on this getup,” I joked.
“I wish I could go,” Hollie said wistfully.
“One day soon we’ll take you somewhere special, okay?” I said, giving her a quick hug before joining Justin in his living room.
Justin was in the process of sending a text when I entered the room. I smiled when he looked up and gaped at me. Hollie giggled behind me.
“I think that means he likes it,” she said, skipping toward the stairs. “Have fun,” she called behind her.
“You look amazing,” Justin said, standing up to join me.
“You like?” I pirouetted around so he could get the full effect of the dress.
“Very much. Makes me second-guess my decision to take you out tonight,” he answered, placing his warm lips on mine.
“Too late for that, buddy. This dress cost a small fortune and demands to be seen,” I said, stepping out of his embrace. “Although looking at you should make me rethink that. Girls will be dropping their panties wherever we go tonight when they see you in this suit,” I added, running my hand over the smooth material of his charcoal-colored blazer. I felt no jealousy, though. Somewhere along the way I realized that he wasn’t going anywhere. Truly believing that made all the difference in the world.
“I only want one pair of panties dropped tonight,” he said, tugging me back into his arms for another hard kiss. “Let’s do this before I change my mind.”
“Where are we going?” I asked while Justin helped gather my dress into the jeep.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” he answered.
“Yes, I would.”
“Soon,” he answered, pulling out of the driveway.
“Whatever.” I pretended to sulk, even though in reality I was touched he was going to so much trouble to make tonight a surprise. “I can’t believe classes start next week,” I complained.
“At least we still have a week. Besides, before we know it, it’ll be summer break. Did you tell your mom you decided to stay in Seattle for the summer?”
“God no,” I answered evasively, shifting in my seat.
“Chicken?”
“Absolutely. I just need to catch her on a good day.”
“Well, good luck when you finally do it. That’s if you still want to?” he asked, looking uncertain.