“Mr. Smith knows I’m here. That’s how I got these,” he said, dangling the keys.
“If you say so. I feel I should point out that it would be a huge bummer if I got kicked out of UW and had to return home with my head hung in shame,” I pointed out.
“Never fear, it’s all cool. Trust me.”
“Said the fox to the hen,” I mumbled. I trailed behind him toward the only source of light on the far side of the large room.
He laughed and linked his fingers through mine. We were still ten feet or so away when the painting on the wall came into focus. The familiar face staring back at me stopped me in my tracks. Stepping closer, I studied the painting intently. It was me, but it wasn’t. It was far too beautiful to be me. I mean, I felt I was cute, but never beautiful, not like this. Justin had taken every feature about myself that I saw as a flaw and somehow made them appear beautiful, almost exotic.
“How?” I whispered, tracing a finger over the image as I fought to keep my tears at bay.
“I did the outline the day we went to the aquarium. You were so beautiful seeing the fish for the first time. You took my breath away. I wasn’t sure I would be able to capture it.”
“This is how you saw me?” I whispered.
“This is how I see you. This is how everyone sees you. I’m not sure where this low self-image you have came from, but trust me. You are the only one who sees it,” he clarified, turning me to face him. “I love you, Brittni.”
“What? Wait. You love me?”
“I love you,” he said, crushing his lips to mine. He loved me. He thought I was beautiful. Me. He loved me.
“I love you too,” I said as the truth roared from me like a freight train. I wasn’t sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way he had captured my heart.
23.
Present Day
3:27 PM
“I hate that your touch still affects me,” Justin admitted after a few minutes had passed.
“Join the club. It’s not like I’m doing cartwheels here,” I muttered, slowly picking up the cards we had dropped.
“You don’t seem to understand what I’m going through here.”
“What you’re going through?” I shook my head at his arrogance. “You think you somehow hold the market on hate?”
“You have no reason to hate me,” he said, shaking with barely suppressed rage.
“Really? What about the fact that you left me and refused to listen? That you never considered my feelings or how hard it was on me. I hate to break it to you, but you betrayed me long before I betrayed you. So get off your high horse. Contrary to what you believe, the world does not revolve around you.”
“I did not cheat on you with Shelly,” he said, jumping to his feet so he could pace again. “I told you that.”
“I’m not talking about cheating.”
“Then what do you mean?” he yelled.
I cringed as his voice vibrated off every corner of the small enclosed space.
“I’m talking about my heart,” I said, surging to my feet. I stood directly in front of him with rage cloaking us like a blanket. “You betrayed my heart. You left me broken and alone in front of everyone,” I added, jabbing him in the chest with my finger. “You left me alone holding all the shattered pieces,” I whispered as the dam holding my sobs at bay finally crumbled.
24.
February 2011
“Brittni, you’re going to be late,” Melissa said, nudging my shoulder.
“What?” I said groggily, squinting in the bright daylight streaming through the window above our desks.