Miss Me Not

"Well, not everyone could make it. Usually, there's closer to ninety of us," he boasted.

"Ninety? Is your family part rabbit or something?"

He sniggered. "Almost. Nah, my grandparents on my dad's side had six kids, all boys, which translates into a shitload of aunts, uncles, cousins, stepcousins, blah, blah, blah."

"That's insane," I said, trying to wrap my brain around the idea of that much family when mine was barely hanging on by a thread. My grandparents on Donna's side of the family had died six months apart the year before I was born. Like my dad, Donna had been an only child, which pretty much left me SOL in the relative category. Of course, the fact that Donna wanted to stab my dad's mom made that relationship all but obsolete. I didn't care. I was good all alone. Alone was simple. It didn't require any baggage.

"That's one way to put it. Next time we get together, I'll bring you with me."

"Right, I'm sure they'd love it if you brought a complete stranger to a family gathering," I said sarcastically.

"Are you kidding? My papaw is old school. His theory is pretty much 'the more the merrier.' Someone always brings a friend. So see, it's all set. Next time you'll get to see the crazy, hectic, mass chaos, overeating extravaganza firsthand."

"Uh, sure, maybe," I answered vaguely. The chances we'd still be friends by his next family reunion were slim to none anyway.

"Sweet, I better head to class," he said, checking the time on his phone. "Meet me at our tree for lunch."

The morning passed swiftly as I mulled over his demand. I should have been pissed that he didn't give me a chance to argue. I'd be damned if I let some guy boss me around. If I wanted to eat lunch with him it'd be my decision, not because he all but demanded my attendance. I was pissed. Well, sort of. I'd meet him at our tree because the idea of having lunch in such a magical place appealed to me. Not because he told me to.

I ran into James outside my fourth period class. "Hey, I'm studying in the library during lunch." My white lie slipped out on its own accord.

"Really?" he asked, knowing my aversion to schoolwork.

"Yeah, no reason to give Whore Cat a reason to call Donna," I said, looking down. I felt uncomfortable lying to him. I was sure he knew I was hiding something. I hated lying in general, and with him it just felt wrong. He was bound to find out, but at the moment, I just wanted to keep my new friendship private as long as I could. It was silly.

"Right," he said, not probing. Our friendship was based on secrets we'd never divulge. "I'll catch you later."

"Truth," I said, heading down the opposite way before I could change my mind. Having lunch with James was the safe bet. I knew my existence was safe with him. Dean was a different story. I could already tell he expected more from our friendship than James ever had. He was bound to be disappointed. I disappointed everyone.

I headed to the far side of the campus where "our" tree was located. The grass beneath the giant tree was empty. I plopped myself down, waiting for Dean to show up. After ten minutes had passed with still no Dean, I finally pulled out the bag of chips I'd bought from the vending machine after second period and began munching them to help calm my stomach that was twisting into tight knots with every second that passed. He wasn't coming. I wasn't surprised, I'd been expecting it. Really, I had.

With five minutes of lunch to spare, I finally crumpled up my empty chip bag and stood up. No one was around to watch my walk of shame, but the pain was still staggering. I'd gone years closing my emotions off and within a week of meeting Dean I'd become a sniveling idiot. I should be grateful he'd given me the out I'd been looking for. Thanks to his no-show, I could now return back to the life I'd been living before he showed up.

My resolve was set. I willed back the emotions bubbling up through my stomach. I was halfway to fifth period when my cell phone chirped in my book bag, but I waited until I sat down in class before checking. Only one person knew my number, so I wasn't surprised when I saw a text from Dean.

Hey sorry I was a no-show. Coach Smith was a complete asshole today. He made the whole basketball team run laps since a couple of guys from the team gave him lip. D

What a relief. He didn't stand me up. His excuse was legitimate. Coach Smith was notorious for his arrogant attitude. He'd played college ball as a third-string player, but liked to make it seem like he played for the NBA. I was lucky enough to escape his narcissism for the last four years, but had heard him plenty of times in the hallways. If bragging was an Olympic sport, he'd have a gold medal.

I reread the text one more time, liking the way he ended his message with a simple D, like I wouldn't know who the message was from. I stowed the phone back in my bag. Texting was still foreign to me, and I was pretty sure it'd take me a half an hour to figure out how to send a simple text. Maybe I'd call him when I got home. Probably not though, reaching out was not my forte.

I was almost home when a familiar jeep pulled up beside me. "Can I give you a ride home?" Dean asked, leaning over the passenger seat.

"My house is right there," I reminded him, pointing down the street at my house.

"I can at least save you a few steps," he cajoled me.

"Seriously?" I asked, raising my eyebrows at him as he pushed the passenger door open.

"Come on, please? I'm bummed we didn't get to have lunch together."

"What? Laps weren't your idea of a fun lunch?" I asked, climbing into the front seat.

"Ha, you're a crack up. I'm thinking of quitting the team. Smith is such a pain."

"Really, what will your parents say?" I asked, wondering about the dynamics of a regular family.

"Oh, they'll support me. My dad and Coach Smith have gotten into it over the last few years. There's definitely no love lost between them," he said, chuckling as he parked his car in my driveway. "Besides, it stopped being fun after we left junior high. It's not like I planned on going pro or anything. Is my jeep okay here?" he asked.